The Life Of the Living
by toonmili
Summary: Tonks follows Harry to a strange house in muggle London that is occupied by someone who should be dead. SS:NT. MAJOR DH SPOILERS
1. Chapter 1

DEATHLY HALLOWS SPOILERS AHEAD

A/N: This story is set ten years after the battle of Hogwarts. Tonks, who Harry saw lying lifeless next to Lupin was knocked out... I will explain why Snape is alive in the story itself.

STORY: The Life Of The Living

Summary: Tonks follows Harry to a strange house and discovers the occupant is a man who is supposed to be dead. NT/SS.

Tonks walked down the concrete steps onto the street with her umbrella swinging back and forth. She had just been to see Gran, her father's mother. When ever she went to see her tears would swell up in her eyes. She would look at the old woman loosing her mind and her body. There would be times when she would look at Tonks and she would cry in fear because she couldn't understand who was this woman by her bedside. Sometimes on good days Tonks would be able to convince her that she was nurse or that she was from the Anglican Church down the way. That was the only constant, she never forgot church.

But on that wet Wednesday there was no convincing her. She was in the middle of feeding her soup from a straw when she looked up at her and realized she didn't no who it was. She tried to calm her down but the old woman exhausted her energy trying to move away from her. But it was no use she couldn't move her body anyway, her flesh was like dead weight. It was like her body had long died but her soul was so stubborn that it refused to leave it.

She never wanted to get that way. She was certain she would be in control of all her function when she departed the world. That way when she met Remus they would be whole, unbroken.

She walked down the pavement pondering what the afterlife would be like, thinking about Remus when she saw Harry disappearing up the stairs in a house up the street. "Oi. Harry," she called but he didn't hear.

She wondered what Harry could be doing in the middle of muggle London looking in such a hurry. She walked up the street until she came to stop by the house. She tried to peer inside but the windows were shut. She was just starting to get awkward glances form the people coming home from work when Harry exited the little house in a bit of a sprint.

He looked up at her and his brows almost reached his hair line. "Tonks, what are you doing here?" he asked closing the door the behind him. In his hand he shoved a small bottle into his pants pocket. He looked up at the overcast sky and back to Tonks.

"I was just visiting my Gran, she is in a home a little way down the street."

"Oh well it's best we be off," he said in a hurried manner. He began to walk, expecting her to follow but she stayed rooted on the step. "Aren't you coming?" he asked.

"Who lives here?" she asked looking at him questioningly.

"No one," he said waving her over.

She raised her brow. "Haaarry," she said teasingly. She was intrigued, she couldn't understand what Harry was hiding from her.

Then form behind her she head the door open, but before she had time to turn around she heard a voice that identified the speaker. There was only one person she had ever known with that voice, she hadn't heard it in eleven years but she would know it anywhere, she knew it since she was eleven. The voice was deep and confident, harsh but smooth. "Potter, you forgot your um...brel...la."

She turned around slowly, thinking that she must have been mistaken, but she wasn't. There in the flesh was Severus Snape, standing there in all his greasy haired glory, very much alive. "Merlin's Beard."

"Heavens Potter can you be trusted to do anything right?" barked the man.

"She just showed up there," said Harry pointing to the step. "I tried to lead her away but then you came out."

Tonks looked form Severus to Harry, wide eyed. "Wait a minute." She said holding her hands up in the air, her umbrella flying all over. "You are alive?"

Snape narrowed his eyes. "Would you believe it if I said I was a ghost."

She rolled her eyes. "You're solid." She said and at the same time she poked him with her umbrella to confirm her suspicion. "I can't believe you are not dead," she shouted outraged.

"You seem disappointed."

"Well if anyone was going to come back from the dead I'd prefer if it was..."

"Tonks," Harry interjected.

"Remus," she continued.

Snape made an odd noise and tossed the umbrella over to Harry and hid himself behind the door once more. "Nymphadora I would appreciate if you tell NO ONE about this. Do I have you're word." He said.

She looked at him, examining his newly pampered features. "Why don't you want people to know you're alive."

"Because it is my choosing. Do I have you're word."

"My word Severus," she said defeated. Snape looked at Harry and shook his head before he closed the door shut. Tonks stared at the door in fascination. "Severus Snape alive, who would have thought?"

Harry was rubbing his head. "I really have to go Tonks, I think you should to."

"What are you playing at Harry, keeping this from everyone?"

"Well he only wanted me to know, he needed someone to control his estate, but if he feels like there's a possibility that more people would know he might move."

Tonks took another look at the door and walked down the step, joining Harry on the pavement. "He has moved before."

"Once, when I first found him but... I found him again, wasn't pleased though." Harry was now walking at a brisk pace.

"Why doesn't he want you to know where he is?"

Harry looked at her. "Well it's sort of hard isn't it, seeing as I know everything now about him and my mother."

"Oh right, I forgot about that. He was in love with her."

Harry nodded. "Well I just got him to make this potions for Albus," Harry said, patting his pocket.

"What's wrong with him?" asked Tonks. Albus was only a little more than a year, she hated when babies got sick, when Teddy was sick it was one of the most terrifying things she had ever been trough.

"He's got a muggle flu called tuberculosis. No idea how he got it... Anyway Severus is pretty good at making cures for muggle illnesses and he likes Albus..."

"What, he likes Albus?"

Harry nodded, quickening his pace again. "Yeah, he has my mother's eyes. He says he can hardly see any James at all. The first time he saw him he actually held him... it was a mid scary really."

"I could only imagine," she said laughing, picturing Snape holding any sort of baby.

Harry came to a stop in an alleyway between two houses with closed windows. He looked at Tonks. "I'll see you around Tonks, and don't forget not to mention it to anyone." And with that Harry disappeared on the spot.

Tonks walked on swinging her umbrella back and forth thinking about what she had just seen. She couldn't help but smile. She knew that it was stupid thinking but she thought to herself that the next time she went to see Gran, she would stop by his place, just to see how he reacts. Of course that was only if he didn't move.

NOTE: So I have started another Snape/ Tonks story. This one has a much more straight forward explanation for them coming back but I have another one that I am working on that will only be available on colourful bat that will maybe be the most depressing thing you have ever read.

In the mean time you can read this one... my first post DH fic.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER: Neighbours.

Five days after seeing Severus Snape for the first time, Nymphadora Tonks found herself outside of his place, peering trough the window. Severus Snape never interested her when he was alive. He was mean, bitter, angry and unsociable but all that changed when he died. Thanks due to Harry, the wizarding world had required a new sort of respect for him that only matched by their adoration of Harry Potter. In the Headmaster's office his portrait hung, next to Dumbledore by request of Harry.

"Oi, who goes there?" a voice from behind her shouted.

Tonks who had her face pressed against the window, turned around slowly and plasters an innocent expression on her face. "Top of the morning," she said waving her hand that was free of the umbrella.

"Are you looking for someone?" asked a short, curvy blond woman, with brown roots.

She scratched her head. "Severus?" she said. "Is he home?"

"Who?" asked the woman, throwing her hair over her shoulders.

"Severus Snape," Tonks said. "He lives just here?" she said pointing at the house.

She laughed lightly. "I think you might be lost dear because Mr. Elton lives there."

Tonks brows were brought together, she was certain that was the house she saw Harry sneak into and came out of.

She could hear the sound of the door next to Snape's opening. She looked beyond the blond woman and saw a tall black woman coming into view. "Allison, why don't you leave the young woman alone," she said. Tonks realised right away that woman had a heavy accent, it was almost like a Jamaican, yet it was quite different.

Alison turned around and looked at the woman with the accent. "Morning there Wendy, I just saw this woman here, peeping into Mr. Elton's house."

"I know the girl, I saw Mr. Elton talking to her." Besides resenting that fact that Wendy called her a girl she was quite thankful for the rescue.

"Okay then," said Allison, who looked at her once again before deciding that the matter was out of her hands. "I know how you have eyes all over the neighbourhood." She walked off in a strut worthy of woman who could seduce any man in close proximity.

Tonks looked at the woman disappearing into a small silver car and then turned her head to Wendy. "Thanks for that?"

Wendy looked at her form head to toe. "So what are you here for?" she asked.

"I'm here to see Sev... I think you know him as Mr. Elton," she finished.

"Why do you want to see Mr Elton?" she asked and her accent became even heavier. "He didn't seem too happy to see you what day it was..."

"Well he's not the sort to want to see people."

She eyed her suspiciously form head to toe. Tonks examined her face, she could tell that the woman was older than her by the way she carried herself but her face wore little sign of age. She had a look of a woman who had been a real beauty when she was younger and was able to successfully hold on to it.

She looked like she was going to tell her off instead she rolled her eyes. "You're one of his customers then?"

"Huh?" she made is sound like Severus had taken the double life of a gigolo.

"I see you come by here and that boy with de scar on he head; it look like a sprit lash him right across he face."

Now she could hardly understand a word of what she was saying because accompanied by the accent was heavy dialect of what ever country she was form.

"Just tell Mr Elton that I ain't tell nobody, so he can't go putting any spirit on me."

"What?" asked Tonks again, "I'm not sure I understand what you're saying."

"He's a obeah man. I know one when I see it. That boy always coming here and leaving with little bottles of this or that. I see that man doing some strange things. In the middle of his apartment he just disappeared into thin air. I've never seen it like that but... he must be really dealing with the devil."

"The Devil?" Tonks asked. Now she understood. She must have thought that Severus was some kind of sprit caller.

"Yes, I know one when I see it, but I pray, I go to church..."

"Okay, well I think you misunderstand, he's not what you say he is?"

"An Obeah man?"

"That," she said taking note of it. " He's not that, I think you're mistaken."

Wendy rolled her eyes and wrapped her robe around her body. "Then you really don't know him after all."

Tonks decided that this woman was quite decided in her mind and it would be best not to argue against her. "So when will he be back."

She shrugged. "He goes and comes as he pleases. But most of the time he is home by nightfall. Do you want me to tell him you stopped by?"

Tonks looked to the door and thought about how he shut it in her face. "Ah...no. I'll catch him some other time."

-o-o-

"Nymphadora, when is Ted coming to see me?" Gran asked looking up at her. Tonks took the baby's brush in her hand and began to brush her grandma's hair slightly. It was thinning and falling out so she had to be very gentle with her.

"He'll be along shortly," she said. She learnt to stop saying that Ted had died. She would only begin to cry hysterically, much like a mother discovering that her first born had been killed for the very first time. It was tragedy all over again. Now she started to say that he would be along shortly, by the end of five minutes Gran would forget that she even asked the question.

Tonks took the mirror from the vanity counter that was almost collecting dust and held it up to her Grandma's face. "You see how pretty your hair looks?" she asked arranging it on her face. "Pretty soon you'll have to be shooting down suitors with a pistol."

The old woman smiled up at her. Even though her body didn't allow her to take solids she still insisted on wearing her dentures. She had been a real beauty in her days, even when she older, she took time to groom. It was the one sure way to get her to calm down, she loved people to brush her hair and tell her how pretty she looked.

-o-o-

Tonks looked at the door next to Severus to make sure that no one was coming out. When she was certain that his foreign neighbour was out of earshot she knocked on the door. Her first knock got no response initially. She figured that he must have had some way of knowing who was at the door because she as certain he was home, she saw the light on. "Severus, I know your there, will you please..." The door pulled open

"What do you want?" he asked.

"Nice to see you too. Can I come in?"

"No," he said like the suggestion was ludicrous.

She was offended at first then she remembered that it was Severus Snape she was talking to. "I need to talk to you."

"You can say what you have to form there," he said under his breath.

"It's about your neighbour."

His eyes raised on his forehead. "Wendy, what about her?"

Tonks was naturally shocked that he was on first name basis with the neighbour who feared him so much. "Well I can't say out here, there might be people listening."

He looked like he was weighing the options, before he decided it would be best to let her in. He open the door wide enough for he to barely enter and then looked at her as she passed him.

Just form a first glance, the narrow house looked just like a muggle's. "Wow you're giving author Weasley a run for his money."

"Please spear me the little comments, you said you had something to tell me."

"Can't I sit?" she complained. He let out a heavy sigh and pointed to room that was beyond the one they were in. It appeared to be a living room. She walked in slowly and looked around. "Oh heavens Severus is that a TV."

"I think you know what a TV looks like." She looked at him and for the first time she noticed how bizarre he looked to her. Instead of his usual black billowing robes, he was wearing a striped shirt and a pair of black trousers. His hair was neatly cut and shaped handsomely around his harsh features.

"Yes I do," she said observing the various other electronics he had, among them a radio with bunch of bright lights that put anything she her grandparents had to shame. "What's with all the muggle things?"

"I don't know if it has escaped your notice but I live among muggles. I have no connection to the wizarding world except, Potter. Therefore If I am going to live among them I have to let believe I am one of them." She looked at him and nodded. With his arms folded, he looked at her. "Isn't there something about my neighbour you had to tell me?"

She snapped out of it. "Oh right. She thinks your evil?"

"What?" he asked.

"I can't remember what she said, she was speaking another language, it could be Jamaican."

"Heavens Nymphadora, Jamaican, is not a language."

"Well whatever," she said shrugging. "She seems to think that you will put...what is it she called it... a sprit on her."

Snape brows came together and he had an expression on his face that can only be described as disappointed. "She said that?" he asked.

"Yes, she thought I was one of your customers... of what I'm not sure."

"Customers?" he asked.

"I can't remember what she called you... something with O, it must be a Jamaican thing."

"She is not a Jamaican," he snapped. "She is from Trinidad, it's a totally different country."

"Well that's not the point is it?" she said. "The point it you have revealed yourself to a muggle."

"I don't live by ministry rules anymore; I can do as I please."

"Right," she nodded. "Because you are dead."

"Exactly," he said taking a seat on one of his cosy looking brown couches.

"You might not want to go disappearing much with your window open," she turned to the direction of the window. "I think she spies on you."

"Really," he said with a sneer coming on his face.

Tonks looked at him closely. Besides the fact that his clothes was different, his appearance on a whole had changed and for the better. She remembered Harry saying that he had once moved when he found him and now she wondered why he didn't move again this time. She looked at him and smiled. "Wendy is a very beautiful woman."

He looked at her, as if annoyed by her presence. "What?"

"Your neighbour is very beautiful, I'm sure you've noticed."

"I heard something to the effect that she used to enter beauty pageants when she was younger... I don't pay attention to such details much."

Tonks nodded. Her cheeks were aching with the effort she was using trying to contain the smile on her face. She was certain that Severus Snape had developed a crush on his neighbour.

NOTE: Okay so I decided to make things a little complicated for Tonks and Snape getting together. I decided to place an exotic beauty queen in her way. We'll see what becomes of his interest. There are several aspects of al these characters that I haven't explained yet. So over the course of the story we'll see what happens with all of them.

And poor Severus, another woman he fancies thinks he might be evil.

Now for some explanation of terms.

Obyah- Is really dark magic in a way. It is really evil and you don't want anyone working it against you. It's really a hard to determine if it is real or not because unlike Voodoo it not a religion and it is just pure evil.

Obyah man- is someone who does Obyah. Scary ass people and you will want to stay away from them. I don't believe it, I think it's a lot of bogus crap... but there are people who believe in it and it affects them I guess because they believe in it. It's sort of like that movie: Skelton Key.

A sprit Lash – is basically when someone puts a curse on you.

So Whenever I have Wendy talking a bunch of things that you guys don't know about. I will explain the story behind it. associated with it.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I should explain, the old woman is Tonks Father's Mother. Tonks father's name is Ted. I was not referring to Teddy. he is still alive. Sorry for the scare. I know this story is very strange but I promise that it is leading to somewhere... and it should be good.

CHAPTER: Letters

_Dear Teddy,_

_How's everything at school, I can tell you must be having a good time because you haven't written me in three days. Is the Defence teacher still giving you a hard time? Don't worry, with any luck he'll be out by the end of the year. I guess I told you that your dad thought Defence for one year, even your godfather maintains that he was the best teacher in the subject he ever had._

_I've been seeing Gran a lot lately, she is looking worse and worse everyday, I reckon it will be any day now. When she passes I'll write professor McGonagall asking to allow you to attend the funeral. You know how much Gran likes you, well when she could remember who you are anyway..._

_I hope you are well and if you need anything, remember that I am always here._

_Love,Mum._

Tonks gave the letter a once over and folded it and attached it to her owls legs. She watched as the owl flew off and was out of sight once more beyond the mountains.

The house where Tonks lived was in the village of Ottery St. Catchpole it was nestled neatly in one of the valley along the lush country side. She chose this location because of the closeness to the Weasleys, she knew it would be best if Teddy had more friendly people around. To people who knew his father had been a werewolf he was something they frowned upon but he would always be welcome among the Weasleys.

She smiled to herself and picked up her handbag and umbrella and looked at her reflection in the mirror. Her long brown hair was combed back in a neat plait, her face, though still young in appearance wore no make up, much like a woman who had retired to take care of her kids. She sighed; turning some strands of her hair a lighter brown to add some spice to her appearance, then left her house in a quick POP!

-o-o-

The rain in London had flooded the streets. Her umbrella could hardly withstand the rain that was beating down on it and wind that was blowing it in every direction. She walked up the narrow street in a bit of a run. She ran up the familiar stone steps and knocked on the door with some urgent drumming. The door opened after a second round of knocks. The beautiful woman who she talked to a week before opened the door.

"Hello," Tonks said trembling.

"Hello," she said eyeing Tonks from head to toe. "Can I help you?" Her accent was barely noticeable now.

"It's me, I am friends with Mr. Elton," she said. She pointed to Snape's house.

"Oh right," she said and the accent returned. Tonks was beginning to feel it was a device she used to get people to stop talking to her. "Do you have a message for him, I don't think he is home?" she asked.

"No, I was actually hoping to talk to you for a moment"

"Me, why?" she said and poor woman looked so scared. Tonks looked up at her and smiled.

"It's about your neighbour."

-o-o-

Tonks sat on the heavily cushioned sofa and looked around. She couldn't help but notice that her furniture and the layout looked a lot like Severus'. She decided to ignore this odd coincidence and get down to business.

"So what is it about my neighbour?" she asked. " Did he ask you to talk to me."

Tonks held up a hand. "No, he would be so pissed when he finds out that I did."

Wendy looked a little more relaxed. " So what about him, is he really a..."

"No," Tonks said immediately.

"Are you sure, I've seen some things," she said, looking genuinely scared.

Tonks nodded. "I am going to tell you a secret and you have to promise not to scream or freak out or move away."

"What?" she asked, sitting like a perfect lady opposite Tonks. " Well he can do thigns, but it's not because he is evil."

-o-o-

" So he a wizard and you're a witch but all are good."

"Yes," Tonks said for what felt like the millionth time.

"And he is a war hero but he is pretending to be dead and that's why he lives next door?"

"Yes," she said again.

"So he's not evil?"

"No?"

"So he lost the love of his life and decided that life isn't worth living?" Wendy asked

"Yes, exactly." She said.

"Okay I can understand that." She said and she took a sip of her tea and rested back on her coffee table. "And he wouldn't want me to know?"

"Well no, not until he trusts you and that might take forever, he is a very closed person?"

"So why are you telling me this."

Tonks perked up and smile. "Because I think the two of you could be good friends. You're neighbours after all."

"Right, I asked him over for tea once and he was very... well rude... didn't stay for more than ten minutes and didn't eat a thing I gave him."

She smiled. "Well that fact that he actually made it inside the house is enormous progress."

"I thought he didn't like foreigners."

"Oh he likes you," she said smiling.

"Really," she said like she was caught off guard. And Tonks mind was immediately filled of images of Snape being cold and avoiding with her.

"Yes, so maybe you should ask him over for tea again."

"Tea and church," Wendy said. "If he isn't evil he should be able to enter churches right."

"I assure you that he can enter churches because he isn't evil."

The woman looked down at her hands and Tonks could see a small smile coming on her face.

-o-o-

Besides being slightly disturbed that Wendy was so easy to convince about Snape's not being evil she was very excited about the prospects. There was nothing that could excite her more than playing cupid.

_Dear Mr. Elton,_

_From the use of your new name you might be confused about this. So I'll tell you who it is. It's me, Tonks, or as you might say, Nymphadora. This is the first time I have written anything to you so it's a bit biazzar and I am not entirely sure how to address, an ex-teacher who should be dead._

_Anyway, I noticed that your neighbour is quite fit and I know you noticed that too. Unknown to you there was a joke going around when I was in fifth year about your sexuality. I was the only one who was convinced that you liked women. And Alas, you have proven me right. I now know for certain that you are in fact attracted to the opposite sex._

_You might be wondering why I chose to tell you this in a letter and not in person. Easy, I am terrified of what your reaction will be when I tell you that I took the liberty of talking to Wendy for you. I know what you are saying: what did I tell her? Well the answer is everything. Don't worry she was really quite understanding. She might be asking you out sometime soon._

_Don't be too worried. She harmless, besides once you've seen someone naked you might as well ask them out right? Oh, yes, she has seen you naked. You really should close your window, especially when you can reach out and touch your neighbour because she is so close. But silly me, I'm assuming that you didn't do that on purpose._

_So if I don't receive a howler in ten days I'll take it as a good sign that it is okay to check the progess of my work._

_Good bye, Mr. Elton._

A/N: Yes I do think I have Tonks digging herself in a little hole here. We all know that she will eventually find herself attracted to Snape and when It happens she would have to deal with Wendy... and it will such even harder becasue she was the one who got them together. He he. Twists are ahead, stick with me on this.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: hey guys thanks for the reviews. I have a disclaimer: The book name: Jk's name not mine...

CHAPTER: Babysitting.

Ginny rested the sleeping baby boy carefully in the crib. "I really have to thank you for this Tonks," she said apologetically. "It's just that Harry is up to head in work an my boss is really eating my throat for this piece on the Harpies."

Tonks shook her head. "Not a problem at all Ginny. Albus has the sweetest temper imaginable, after raising Teddy, I can handle him just fine."

She nodded in appreciation. "I have everything here," she said pointing at the baby bag. "He had his tea just before we came so in about two or three hours he'll be hungry again. And sorry for the trouble again."

Tonks shook her head. "Stop apologising and leave. I don't reckon your boss would be pleased if you show up late."

"Right, going," Ginny said. She walked over to crib and looked down at the sleeping child. " Albus sweetheart, mummy will be back for you tonight. Don't give auntie Tonks any trouble okay."

"I'm sure if he was awake and able to talk he would say: Get a step on it woman." Tonks joked.

"Right." Ginny said backing away from the crib. She turned around and walked out of the nursery and into the living room. She waved at Tonks before she walked out the door, immediately after she heard a faint pop.

Tonks looked down at the sleeping baby and smiled. It seemed like only yesterday when she was looking down on her own son from that very position. Now he was in his first year in Hogwarts. It was amazing how time flew.

She sat on the chair where she used to sit when Teddy was a baby and picked up a book form the side table. Maybe it was for light reading or for comical purposes but Tonks had purchased a copy of Rita Skeeta's latest piece of slander called Severus Snape: Scoundrel or Saint? It took her a total of eight years to compile enough information on Snape to write a hundred page book. Where there would normally be interviews of family and friends there were interviews of muggles who vaguely remembered a strange boy living in Spinner's End. His adult years were only documented by people who were already dead. His part in the war was only known by Harry who had obviously refused to talk to her. She did manage to get some information out of a Horace Slughorn whose comment on Snape was: Never seen a more love sick boy in my life. When I came back here to teach and we were colleagues he never liked me to bring it up... but I dear say, he did love Lily Evans... but can we blame him? We all loved her."

Tonks was just about to get into a rather juicy chapter that supposedly dealt with a list of people Severus supposedly killed when she head a loud crack in her living room. She took out her wand from her jeans and had it at the ready. It was not a normal occurrence for a wizard to apparate within someone's premises, they usually announced themselves form a distance. She looked down at Albus who stirred lightly in his sleep.

She walked out the room and crept in the living room with as much stealth she could muster. She was doing so well until her foot caught the rug. She felt her self tumbling down and her wand flying out her hand. She jumped up form the ground like a springbuck being chased by a lion and stood up firm.

There, with her wand in his hand was Severus Snape.

"Are you trying to kill me," she whispered.

"As tempting as it may be I have to say that it was not my intention for coming here."

She relaxed. "I take it you got the letter."

He threw the wand back to her and she caught it without any trouble. "Now let me make something perfectly clear," he said walking towards like a prophet of doom. "I will not have you make a mockery of me and the life I choose to lead."

"I didn't..."

"Think?" he completed.

"I just thought..."

"You thought what?" he said raising his voice now.

His anger was something to behold and she felt like she deserved it. The moment the owl left with the letter she had been dreading this very moment. She really had no business devilling in his personal life but she couldn't help it. It seemed like such a good idea at the time.

"The only reason why I risk exposure is to make sure that what I am about to tell you sinks in." He waved a warning finger her, stepping closer and closer.

The baby cried.

She let out a heavy sigh of relief because he seemed distracted by the sound. "Is that a baby," he asked.

She didn't answer she stepped away form him and walked in the nursery. Albus was laying on his back, crying and wiggling his little legs and hands. She picked him up and began to pat him gently on the back.

"You have another child?" he asked. She shook her head while she continued to try to shhh the crying baby. The tears got louder.

"Is that... Albus?" he asked. He was walking closer to her. He stopped next to her and looked down at the baby's face. "What are you doing with Potter's son?" he asked.

She looked at him and rolled her eyes. He looked like she had just kidnapped the baby or something.

Then something strange happened. Severus Snape actually reached out his hands and took the baby away from her. She stared at him in amazement. "Eh...are you sure you know what you're doing?" she asked.

But Severus wasn't paying attention to her, he was patting the baby gently while he hummed some tune she did know. He took a seat on the chair and continued to hum to Albus while she stood there and watched. There wasn't a baby on earth that didn't like her but Albus seemed to have a natural attraction to Severus. He was quiet in no time at all was drifting back to sleep.

When he had fallen completely asleep Severus stood from the chair and walked over to the crib and placed the baby gently down. Albus, opened his eyes for a brief moment looking at Severus then fell right back into his deed sleep.

He stepped away from the crib with a pained expression on his face and walked back out into the living room. "How long has he been here?"

"Ginny just dropped him off," Tonks said. Happy that his anger from earlier seemed to have abated. "Harry told me that you liked Albus..."

He made a noise that could only be interpreted as: He is mistaken.

"You are very good with him, I think he likes you." She knew that most normal men went trough a phase when they actually wanted children. Was this happening to him? She didn't know, Severus Snape was not a normal man.

He raised his hands. "Hasn't anyone ever told you? The kids just love me..." he said sarcastically. Tonks managed to laugh.

He took a seat on her sofa and rest his hands behind his head and stretched his legs out. He looked like he was getting comfortable.

She smiled at the sight. "Can I get you some tea?"

"Already had tea, I thought you would have known that."

That was obviously a comment on her advice to Wendy. "So you had tea with her then."

He said nothing instead he put himself in a proper sitting position.

"Is that a no?" Tonks asked.

"No," he said.

"So it is a yes?" she asked.

He sighed. "I don't want you to go about thinking that you did me some kind of favour, I am perfectly capable of planning my own rendezvous. Thank you very much."

She took a seat next to him on the couch, as far away as possible. "But at your rate it would have taken ten years."

"Ten years is very short for a dead man..." he said pensively.

"That's cute, it really is, but she is alive and so are you... I think."

He looked at her and rolled his eyes. She couldn't help but notice that there was something different about him. She looked at him and smirked came on her face.

"I don't like that look, are you up to something."

She shook her head. "No, I was just wondering if it's true that you killed someone's dog when you were eight."

He looked at her for a long moment with his brows together.

"It's in Rita Skeeta's book about you."

"I should have known that you would indulge in that junk."

"So it's not true."

"No. Although my father did run over one with his car."

She smiled at him. "Are you staying for lunch?"

He seemed to ponder the question longer than any normal person would. "Come off it, you are a man and you live alone, I'm sure you will gladly like someone feed you a warm meal."

"And yet I have managed to take care of myself all these years." He seemed so full of pride.

"Yes but it is different to have someone cook for you... "

"Okay Nymphadora, amaze me with your culinary abilities...

She bit her bottom lip and smiled at him. "I will, I make the best pasta." She got up and headed to her kitchen that was beyond another door in the living room.

As she took down the pots and pans form the rack above her head she couldn't help but entertain an idea that would have seemed ridiculous to her before; She was actually thinking that she could be friends with Snape. She had a talent for detecting what people needed, and just like she was able to detect how completely alone Remus was, she was now able to tell how completely isolated Severus must have felt. His very nature for years had been that of wizard, now he lived in a muggle word and was expected to do muggle things. His only contact was Harry, a man twenty one years his junior who he could hardly stand to look at... she was certain that he could need her as a friend. She knew that she would be able to full that void in his life, the connection with the wizarding world she knew he sorely missed.

A/N: So it is beginning. She is not attracted to him yet but it will happen... and when it does Ha ha ha... Can't wait to write it but it has to happen in a progress.

I should tell you guys that I update this story when ever... More frequent than often because she I am too excited over what I have in my head to wait... he he...

Okay I am officially a nerd.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews guys, I really appreciate it.

CHAPTER: Where the Sun Don't Shine.

When Severus was living among the rest of his kind, Tonks would always get he feeling that he wanted nothing more than to be alone. Ironically, now that he was isolated form the rest of the wizarding world she had the feeling that he wanted nothing more than the company of his kind. She guessed that his relationship with Wendy would naturally full some voids, but others she could never fill. That was where Tonks came in. While he never shared anything about his personal life with her he would cling to her as a connection of the life he once had.

Originally it started that she would visit him on her way from seeing her Gran but most of the time he wouldn't be home and when he was home he was entertaining his neighbour. He decided, since Wendy worked as a telephone operator for a phone company at nights, he would be free at that time. Schedules worked out, she started her visits.

At first it was once a week but when she volunteered to take care of Albus on Saturdays he would always find some reason for why he had to stop by and he would end up spending the day with them. She enjoyed these visits. Though he was still short tempered, he was a lot more pleasant she ever imagined it was possible for him to be.

After a while, her scheduled had come to take one a new shape. She saw Gran three times a week, she visited Molly once every two weeks, took Albus once a week and saw Severus every week night.

One would think that two adults would find something interesting to do when the night came but one would be wrong on that account. The time they spent together was mostly in silence, because Severus had developed a love for television. Since he wanted everything to be on his terms he decided that she must watch television with him.

She didn't mind because television was actually interesting. When she was younger she was allowed to watch a little bit of cartoons but it never fascinated her. Adults were allowed to watch far more interesting things. So they sat on his long sofa watching a show called Frasier, something that Severus swore was a good show. Sometimes she wondered what he liked about it because he never laughed at any of the jokes but he would always watch it, episode after episode until something else had started.

She was watching Frasier trying to worm his way out of some situation that he managed to get himself in when she turned to him. "Severus?" she asked.

"Hmm," he responded. It was not a good idea to disturb him while he was watching his show.

"Why do you like this show?"

He looked at her and frowned. "Because it's a good show."

"How do you know it's a good show?"

He sighed in frustration. "Because it is, don't hear how the people are laughing."

He was referring to live studio audience. "You're not laughing. I don't even think you even get the jokes."

He rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the television. He took the remote and volumed the TV. She looked at him and smiled, she knew that she had a victory over him.

"It's after midnight, I should get home, I'm watching Albus tomorrow."

"Don't you always have him on Saturdays? Why do people make children if they don't want to take care of them?"

It wasn't beyond him to ask blunt questions like that. "I asked them to babysit him on Saturdays, I miss having a little one around." She stood up and collected her scarf from the other chair. Tonks looked at him and smiled and disappeared on the spot.

-o-o-

Albus was asleep in the crib and Tonks and Severus were sitting by on her sofa eating the lunch that she prepared. He always ate very slowly so by the time she was almost finished he was not half way through his chicken parmesan.

She was looking at him as he slowly took a piece of chicken and placed it in his mouth and chewed very slowly. He looked at her. "It is very poor manners to stare at someone while they are eating."

She shrugged. "I wouldn't, if you weren't so damn interesting." He ignored her and continued to eat. "Do you like it?"

He didn't look at her. "It is satisfactory." She grinned because it was his way of saying that he loved it and would be having seconds.

She got up to take her empty plate to the kitchen. When she returned he pointed at a letter on the table. "That came for you," he said.

She looked at it recognising it as a letter form Teddy right away. "It's from Teddy," she said excitedly and he looked like he really couldn't care less. She took the letter and tore it open.

_Mum,_

_Thanks for the box of cauldron cakes, they were really great. I managed to turn my tea cup into a mouse yesterday; I was the first in my class. Potions has been great so far, Sir reckons that I am ahead of the rest of the class. Defence hasn't been so good though. Professor Cromwell started teaching werewolves today. He asked me to stand and list all the reason why werewolves rights are restricted by the ministry of magic. I didn't answer. Then he told the entire class that children born of werewolves are not common but from the one case he knew of their intelligence are stunted by their infected blood. _

_Mum, I never want to be ashamed of dad because I know what you say about him, I know what uncle Harry says and I believe you but I guess I am worried that anyone will find out that my father was one. What if someone looks up my last name and find out I am part werewolf."_

_Any way, I saw Hagrid today, he invited me and Adam to have tea with him this afternoon, so I have to get going now._

_Bye,_

Tonks folded it, she bit her nail and stared into space. "What year do they teach werewolves in school?" she asked Severus even though she knew the answer.

He looked at her and she knew that he sensed something was wrong. "Third."

"That's what I thought." She passed the letter of Severus and watched as he opened it and read it.

He took the letter and placed it on the table. "I know about Cromwell, his father was one of the original signatories of the document that classified werewolves as dangerous creatures."

She crossed her arms around her waist, feeling her blood boiling in her veins. "Am I wrong to want to strangle the living daylight out of him?" she asked.

"No, that was bloody out of order. I don't even think I would have done that."

She felt like the heat she was radiating was too much for her to handle, she had to act. She looked around the room frantically. "Where's my boots?" she asked urgently.

He pointed to the mat that was close to the front door. "Where are you going?" he asked.

Pulling on her suede boots one at a time, she looked at Severus. "I am going to give him a piece of my mind that's what. I am going to tell him that that if he has a problem with my husband he can shove it where the sun don't shine."

"Nymphadora?"

"What?" she snapped. She grabbed her coat and turned to him.

"Don't," he said simply.

"Don't what, stop this asshole from torturing my son, form disgracing my husband's memory."

He walked over to her took her by the shoulders. "He can't ever to that, On the memorial his name is cast in stone, no one can take that away from him. But I assure you that if you go there and make a scene your son would not forgive you."

She was confused. "He wants me to help him. Why else would he write me?"

"Because you are his mother and one of the few people who know that his father was a werewolf. But he doesn't want you fight his battles for him. He would feel much more accomplished if he could work it out on his own."

"No, that's you Sev," she said, matter-of-factly. "You don't have any children so you don't know."

He nodded. "I know it's hard to believe but I was an eleven year old boy once... I know for a fact that I would not want my mother showing up defending my half-blood status to my housemates."

She pulled away form him. "I appreciate what you are trying to do but this is _my_ son, _I_ choose when to fight for him and I choose when he can do it on his own. When you finally grow up and get over yourself then maybe you will understand."

The moment it left her tongue she regretted it but she didn't have time to apologise.

"Fine then, be on your way..." he said shooing her.

"Will you be okay alone with Albus for a while?" she asked in a softer voice.

He said nothing. He just walked to the sofa and took up his plate and continued to eat his food slowly. She felt terribly guilty for hurting his feelings but she couldn't think about that just yet. She let her self leave the house and travel all the way to Hogsmead.

-o-o-

**Two hours and some minutes Later**

"He just went back to sleep," Sevreus said gathering his coat. "He had his tea an hour ago so I expect it will be a while before he wakes again."

Tonks had just apparated back into her house and as soon as she had done so Severus started gathering his things to leave. She looked at him. "Severus please," she said softly.

He wasn't really paying any attention to what she was saying. "I will be busy next week so don't bother stopping by." The way he said it he would have convinced anyone that he was being truthful.

"Severus I know that I snapped a while a go but I need you stay here with me okay," she pleaded. Her voice was shaking and the lump in her throat was becoming painful. She could feel her eyes beginning to water.

He looked at her, his balck eyes watching the tears escaping hers. He sighed and threw his coat aside. "I'll stay for a while." He took a seat back in the couch and leaned forward. "But don't ever loose your sense and speak to me like that again, you understand?" She nodded. She took off her coat and her boots and her scarf.

She and Severus despite spending all that time together and never actually touch each other, unless by accident. She knew he was a man who valued his space and most likely didn't want to touched but at that moment she didn't care. She needed someone to hold her and since he was her friend he was as good a candidate as any.

She crawled in the chair next to him and rested her head in his chest. He seemed stiff at first but then he leaned against the air of the chair, allowing her to get comfortable. He placed on hand around her waist and the other he used to stoke her hair. "You were right?" she whispered, knowing that her tears was soaking his shirt.

"I know," he said and kissed her forehead.

A/N: So I had to speed up the friendship between them a little. I couldn't write all the progressive friendship business. I have no patience for that.

I didn't write what happened between Tonks and her son in Hogwarts because it would have taken too long and I will be talking about that in another chappie anyway, so don't fret. It's nothing special but as you can imagine he is angry with her and Severus was right.

Well the god news is, I have established the touching...


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Okay I was so surprised to see how quickly you guys left reviews for the last chapter. I really appreciate it. I hope you guys like this chapter.

CHAPTER: Buying Clothes.

Since she had determined that it was okay to touch and he didn't shrivel up and melt it was hardly a big deal anymore. In fact just for kicks she would touch him to see how long it would take him before he complained about her being to clingy. On a day when she was feeling particularly mischievous she decided to play a horrible joke on him, she took his hand in hers and squeezed it and smiled at him. The look he gave her as he pulled his hand away made it obvious that he thought she was coming on to him. He didn't hold this idea for long because she began to laugh so much that ten minutes had passed and she was actually still laughing and tears were escaping her eyes. She thought that he would have been offended by her laughing but he was actually looking at her in amusement which made her laugh even more. She only decided to stop when it had become dangerous and she couldn't breath and she couching and her stomach mussels were fully worked.

"I'm happy that you find me that amusing, perhaps I should join a circus troupe."

"I'm sorry for laughing; it's just that I didn't expect that reaction."

He waved her off turning his attention to the television. "There is very little you can say or do to bruise my ego."

She rubbed his shoulder playfully. "Aww did I bruise your little ego."

"No I have a rather healthy ego at the moment."

She nodded in comprehension. "Right, you and that smouldering seductress next door. How is Wendy, you never talk about her."

"That's because it's none of your business."

"Oh come on, I was the one who talked to her for you, I at least have the right to know something about my work."

He leaned his back against the arm of the sofa and tuned his attention away from the TV. The only reason he was paying her any attention was because Frasier was not on at the moment. "You give yourself too much credit." She leaned against the opposite arm of the chair and spread out her legs so her feet were at his side, something she knew he hated. She shrugged.

"Okay Nymphadora what do you want to know?" he asked.

"How is she in ..."

"No questions about sex, I will not discuss that with you."

She sighed and frowned. "Fine, tell me what you can tell me."

She got a pondering look on his face. "Right, I can tell you that she can speak six languages."

"Six?" she said in amazement.

He nodded. "English, Spanish, French, German, Portuguese and Hindi, all fluently."

For some reason that information angered her. "Why would she learn all those languages? I mean she lives in England right?"

"Some people are not as limited in their appreciation for culture as you are Nymphadora."

"It's one thing to buy a T- Shirt but to learn a language. I mean what possible use could she have for learning Hindi."

He put his finger on his bottom lip and smiled. "I suppose it's to get closer to her roots. She is half Indian."

"She's half Indian?" she asked.

"Yes, her mother was an Indian and her father was a black. She goes to temple and church."

"So she's Hindu and Christian. I'm pretty sure that is breaking some rules."

He shrugged. "She felt very conflicted about her faith and which she should choose. She decided that she shouldn't."

She couldn't believe that Wendy was discussing her faith with him. It seemed like something so personal for two people who just started dating to talk about. And out of the blue the words; "Remus is a Baptist," left her mouth.

"Remus_ is_ a Baptist," he repeated with brows brought together.

She nodded. "Yes, his father was a muggle, did you know... and he used to take him to church every Sunday when he was younger in hope of curing him, never worked though."

He took his finger and intertwined them with each other and pushed it outwards to loosen the joints. "Okay Nymphadora."

"My Gran is Catholic," she said. "You could imagine her reaction when she made my dad."

He nodded.

"What about you, what was your father?" she asked.

"An alcoholic," he said plainly. He turned his attention to the TV and turned it up his show had started.

She sat there staring at him, wondering if he was more open with Wendy, and why despite her attempts to open up to him he seemed so uninterested in anything she had to say.

-o-o-

TWO WEEKS LATER

"I don't like her," Tonks said to Harry leaning against the post of the crib where Albus slept.

It was Saturday and Severus had just been by to tell her that he and Wendy had made plans and would not be by until very late in the day. This frustrated her to no end, because taking care of Albus wasn't half as much fun when she had to do it alone. Of all the days Wendy had choose to pull him away it had to be the day they watched Albus together. She didn't like it when her schedule was ruffled.

"Why not, I thought you said she was nice," Harry asked. He had the day off but he still brought Albus Tonks as she always looked forward to his visits.

Tonks put her hand on her head and turned to look at Harry. "Do you know she can speak six languages?"

Harry put his hands over his mouth and opened his eyes wide. "Oh, the horror."

She rolled her eyes, clearly sensing the sarcasm. "Harry, who in Merlin's Beard has time to learn six languages, fluently."

"Maybe she's really smart. Don't you have to be smart to enter beauty pageants of something?"

"No, you have to learn to sleep with judges and look good in a bath suit."

"Does she look good in a bath suit?" Harry asked. He saw the look on Tonks' face and held his hands up. "Just curious, I mean Snape must be having a grand ole time."

"Ugh, please don't go there," she said. "It's enough to have to listen to him talk about her all the time... Wendy can do this... Wendy can dot that... It's so annoying, it's like she can do everything."

Harry patted her on her shoulder. "Well she can't do half the things you can do Tonks."

"This has nothing to do with me," she said unable to believe what Harry was insinuating.

"Of course not." He said grinning.

"She is just not a good person. I have a gut feeling about this..."

"Um, that's not your gut, it's your heart."

She stared at him trying to determine what would be the consequences for strangling the boy who lived. He couldn't be more wrong, he was actually insinuating that she was jealous of Wendy. Why on earth would she be jealous of a woman who was unfortunate enough to have Severus Snape as a lover. The very thought was hilarious, though she wasn't laughing as much now compared to when the idea first popped in her head. In fact she was not laughing at all.

-o-o-

After Ginny came by to collect Albus, she apparated to his house when it was well after eight in the night. She knew that Wendy had no nights off and worked everyday of the week, so if he was home, he would be home alone.

When she first got there she saw the TV was off, which meant that he was not home or he was upstairs. The only place upstairs she had ever seen was the bathroom. She had never ventured beyond there and she had no interest to. But that night she felt something pulling her up the stairs. Just as her foot landed on the first step she head the front door open. She leaned forward and looked in the doorway to see that Severus was now coming in. He saw her right away.

He didn't seem surprised to see her. "How long have you been here?" he asked.

"I just got here," she replied, coming down the step and walking closer to him. He took of his coat and placed it on a coat hanger that was by the door. Underneath it he was wearing a black woollen turtle neck sweater. She had never seen him in it before. "I've never seen you in that?" she said.

"Wendy got it for me."

"Really, how come you didn't tell me?"

He walked passed her and headed into the living room and slammed his body down on the couch. "I wasn't aware that I had to share all the details of my relationship with you."

She ignored him and took a seat next to him. "So she's buying you clothes now. Isn't that a little soon?"

"Is two months soon?" he asked leaning his head back on the sofa. "I thought that would have been snail pace to you."

"I didn't buy Remus clothes until we were married."

"You married him after dating him for two months," he said slowly.

It was a point well taken. "Do you like it?" she asked.

"No," he said. "I hate wool, it itches."

She bit her bottom lip and smiled. She looked at him as sleep threatened to overtake him; his eyes were falling shut. He had never been too tired to watch TV before. She wondered what it was that he could have been doing to exert so much energy. A million and ten things ran trough her head and she didn't like any of them because they all involved an extreme amount of touching, panting, moaning and groaning. She didn't like that idea at all. She didn't want Wendy to touch him and she certainly didn't want Severus to touch Wendy.

She sat there looking at him and her breaths began to get heavy, she just realised that Harry was right.

A/N: Okay, she finally likes him.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: When your reading this chapter you'll find that the errors you have maybe come to know me for are not there. Well I didn't learn to spot them if that's what your thinking. I got a beta.

Lucky for me and you really. So I have to give major thanks to Amy Napierkowski for reading this first and fixing it up and everything...

NOW: As a little note. Some conversations in this chapter is reference to conversations that took place in chapter five, you know the one I said I would explain later. Well now is later. If Tonks says some things you don't remember her saying then it took place off page in chapter five. I hope that explains everything.

CHAPTER: Starved for attention.

The realisation that she was starved for attention from Severus came at a bad time. She could hardly ponder all the ways she could get him to pay more attention to her because she had more important things on her mind; her son. It was Christmas holidays and Teddy was home for two weeks but only after she wrote him a letter demanding that he gets his butt on the train when the twentieth of December came around.

He walked in the door and went straight to his room refusing meals and mumbling things under his breath that she was certain were not pleasant. She thought that he would have been over it in a day or two but the kid was intent on starving, although she was certain that she heard him sneaking in the kitchen at night trying to find something to eat. When the morning came around, he would rush off to the bathroom and then set out for the Weasley's. She had planned to tell Mrs. Weasley not to let him in but she decided that she would only make him hate her even more.

"Teddy," she called at his door. He didn't answer but she knew he was there as he turned up his radio. She shouted over the music. "I'm stepping out for a while, if you want dinner it's in the kitchen." She waited for a replay but none came. She sighed and walked down the narrow hall and disapparated in a POP!

-o-

She carried herself to Severus' place. It was after seven which meant he would have been home. She hadn't been to see him in a while. Aside from being petrified by the ideas that were popping up in her head she couldn't just pick up and leave Teddy on his own.

He wasn't in the living room watching TV like always but all the lights were on which meant he was home. She got a series of horrible ideas; what if Wendy is here? What if they are upstairs making love? Maybe I should go back home? No, you should interrupt that. No, that would ruin the mood. You can't do that, that's crass.

"No it isn't!" She said aloud.

"Who are you talking to," she heard Severus ask from behind her.

She spun around and looked at him. He looked like he was getting ready for bed. He was wearing sleeping pants and plain white T-shirt. "Did I interrupt something?" she asked.

He walked past her and went to the couch and slouched down. "Nothing more than you usually do."

"So no one's here?" she asked cautiously.

"No. Is anyone ever here?" He took the remote and turned on the TV.

"You look like you were ready for ah...bed."

He flipped though the channels, settled on the evening news, and stretched his body out on the couch. "Well I thought I was going to be alone tonight. I didn't know I had a reason to dress up."

Did he mean that as a joke? She didn't know. He really was never that dressed down around her so he could have been serious, but it hardly seemed like something he would do, at least not on account of her.

She leaned over the couch from behind and looked down at him. He was lying on his back, sprawled out. She found her eyes travelling up and down his body, wondering what was under all those clothes, although she didn't have to wonder much. That thin fabric of the sleeping pants left little to the imagination. When the light from the television hit him, she was certain she could see him through the cotton, or maybe it was just wishful thinking. Her mind immediately began to scold her for thinking about him in that way. She couldn't allow that to happen.

"You should take a picture; it will last longer." He said.

She could tell that this was something he clearly learned from TV, as he was not the sort to make comments like that. Before, if he caught her staring at him, he would just comment on how annoying was. He would never be cheeky or borderline flirtatious. Unless, he _knew_ she was trying to see his family jewels, there was no reason to make a comment like that… was there?

"I was just thinking about something," she said slowly.

"Hmm."

"My son's still angry with me. He reckons that I have destroyed his reputation, he says that everyone thinks he's a pansy."

His eyes caught hers. "I thought you said that you didn't speak to Professor Cromwell?"

Just then she actually had the urge to do something incredibly daring because had completely lost her mind. She wanted to climb over back of the couch and land on his him to see how he would react. Even though she was thinking it was crazy, it didn't stop her from doing it. She climbed over the couch that wasn't that high and landed on him, her bum rubbing up against him.

"Ouch," was all he said even though he made no attempt to move. She turned her body around so she was facing him. He was a full head taller than her and she didn't fall that gracefully, so she still had to look up at him. She tapped on his chest. "I didn't speak to him," she started, even though she was really thinking about why he hadn't thrown her off him and onto the ground. "I ran into Teddy on the seventh floor with his friends."

He raised his hands from the side of him and rested it on her back. "Were you going to see McGonagall then?"

Her mind was going absolutely crazy with the new development that she almost didn't answer the question. "Ah... No, I was about go down to the fourth floor to the staff rooms. I came through the room of requirement, through Aberforth's old portrait. I can't believe they didn't close it..."

"Well it saved the school, didn't it?" he asked.

He shifted slightly and she wondered if she was too heavy for him. "Yes, I suppose it's wise to keep one gate open."

She laid there in silence for a while, feeling his hand on her back and his body under hers, and she found herself wishing she wasn't wearing jeans because the fabric was so thick.

"What are you going to do about your son?" he asked.

"I got him one hell of a Christmas gift. Cost me an arm and a leg but I think he should like it," she said. "Speaking of which... I knew there was a reason why I came here."

"You mean you didn't come to bother me."

"No, I came to ask you if you want to have Christmas lunch."

"Lunch?"

"Yes, I'm making a feast, will you come?"

"Ahh... Wouldn't there be a slight problem with your son seeing me."

She looked up at him and smiled. "He has no idea who you are or what you look like. It's not like kids go crazy for the past."

"How could he not know who I am?" he asked as if insulted and shocked.

She tapped him on his chest again. "I hate to say this but it's very easy to forget someone who never really lived. People in the Order will always remember you, but who else will. Rita took so long to gather information on you that by time the book was finished everyone forgot about you. You sort of made yourself invisible."

He was silent for a while, with just a pondering look on his face. He turned his eyes from her to the TV, which was on mute. "I'll stop by," he said.

"Good," Tonks said. "Is there anything you like to eat on Christmas?"

"No, what ever you make is fine."

"Okay Sev," she said and patted him on his chest one last time. She pushed herself off him and she felt his hands slide off her back. Standing up, she straightened her clothes. "I'll she see you tomorrow."

He made a non committal noise but she knew that he was going to be there. She nodded and disapparated in front of him.

-o-

"Shall we say a prayer," Wendy said in a cheerful voice.

Tonks looked from Wendy to Severus. She wanted to strangle him. When she asked him over for lunch she invited him alone, not her. Her Christmas was already going horribly; her son didn't get her anything even though she gave him to buy something for her and then he refused to open the gift she got him. He didn't want to come to the table for lunch but only decided he would when the pretty woman asked him to. It was absolutely sickening.

Tonks had never been so annoyed by prayer. She did not want to hold hands with her and break bread. She wanted her out of her house.

All her hard work, which she did with her son and her friend in mind, would be shared with this woman, someone who she couldn't stand. So her roast turkey, bacon and sausage rolls, roasted potatoes, mince pies, veggies, and Yorkshire pudding would all be shared with _her_.

When they were finished with the prayer they began to pass around the food. All the while, Teddy was refusing everything. She was content with ignoring him, knowing that he would get hungry eventually, but Wendy had to open her mouth.

"Don't you want to try some of all this nice food? Your mother spent a long time cooking it."

Teddy shrugged. "I didn't ask her too. She's always doing things she's not asked."

"But aren't you happy to have all this food, there are some people who don't even have any food to eat."

She knew this trick; this was the one her mother used to use on her when she didn't want to eat her cooking.

Teddy took a piece of Turkey from the centre of the table and placed it on his plate. "I will eat it, even though it tastes like paper."

Somehow she felt like if she stayed at the table a second longer she would go crazy or swear like a sailor. She got up from the table, rather loudly. "Excuse me for a second," she said in a voice that she hoped sounded pleasant.

She walked quickly to the front door and darted outside into the snow, almost tripping on the rug in the process. She looked around the snowy valley and took a deep breath. Her neck felt stiff, her feet were aching from standing on it for so long, and she mostly felt emotionally drained. She had never quarrelled with Teddy for so long, and it was weighing on her. She missed her son. Things weren't helped by Severus either, who decided that it would be a good idea to bring Wendy around. Her excessive happiness, her perfect little face, her perfect shoulders, small waist and long legs were enough to drive her crazy. "I can't take this anymore," she said.

"Nymphadora." She heard Severus' voice behind her.

He was the last person she wanted to see right now. "Yes," she said.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

She turned around. He had never been outside of her house out of fear of being seen. This must have been a huge moment for him. "I'm fine," she said leaning her head back to get the stiffness out of her neck.

"Then come back in the house." He said. "He's just being a normal teenager."

She bit her bottom lip and nodded.

"I can assure you that your cooking does _not _taste like paper."

She looked at him and knitted her brows. "I gotta go," she said.

"What?"

"I have to see my Gran." She said.

"Now?" he asked.

She nodded again. "Just go inside and see that they're all okay. I'll be back in a while."

She didn't leave time for him to respond. She disapparated.

-o-o-

She walked back in the door some two hours later and dusted the snow from her hair. When she came in, Severus and Wendy were on the sofa talking but she couldn't see Teddy anywhere, she guessed he was in his room.

She wanted to say something to them but nothing came out. Instead she walked in the kitchen and closed the door behind her. She was expecting to see a heap of dishes waiting for her to clean but someone had cleaned the kitchen spotless. She leaned over the sink looking for something to do, anything to keep her mind off the fact that she was having one of the worst days in her life.

She heard the door open behind her and she already knew who it was. He closed it. "Do I have to ask if you're alright?" he said, he sounded annoyed.

She kept her back to him. "I'm fine," she said. But the moment he asked her if she was okay tears began to fall from her eyes.

"Turn around," he demanded.

She did not want to turn around, instead she pinned her hair behind her ears. She felt his hand taking her arm and turning her around. She closed her eyes because she didn't want to see his reaction to her tears.

"Hmm," he whispered, in tone that would suggest that her tears were unpleasant. "Why do I know you so well, Nymphadora?"

"I'm sorry," she said. "But I am having a really bad day."

"I can tell. What happened?"

She opened her eyes. She was expecting him to have a cold and nonchalant expression on his face, but instead, his eyes were filled with warmth and concern. "My Gran died this morning," she said. He didn't say anything. Instead he moved her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her. She buried her head in his chest and let her tears fall, soaking his shirt.

A/N: Okay, I hope you guys liked it. I know what your thinking; Why would Severus bring Wendy to Tonks' place? That pissed me off too. But in all fairness she is dating him and they do usually spend the days together and since Tonks was the one who put them together in the first place he didn't think it would be a problem.

But there were some scenes where I wished I could sneak in his POV but I couldn't. Even though it would be interesting to hear what was going trough his mind when Tonks was top of him, I had to keep the flow of the story and it's always from Tonks' POV. Although in a later chapter there will be a small piece from Harry's POV.

Anyway, I don't want to make this note as long as the chapter itself... So I'll stop now.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thanks again to Amy, my beta.

I hope this chapter gives you guys an idea of what Snape is thinking without me having to write his POV.

CHAPTER: Slag Tags.

Tonks stood outside Severus door and drummed her knuckles on the wood.

"Who lives here, mum?" Teddy asked, from next to her. After Gran died, their argument seemed to melt away. It hardly seemed worth it to fight anymore.

"My friend," she said with shattering teeth. "He had Christmas lunch with us."

"Oh," he said sounding disappointed.

"What don't you like him?" she asked, knocking again on the door.

Teddy shrugged. "He's okay, it's just that he has a girlfriend, doesn't he?"

She grinned down at her son, trying to determine what was going on his head. "Yes..." she said cautiously.

"Well Miss Wendy already has him, so who do you have?" he looked up at her with questioning eyes. She gazed back at him.

Just then Severus pulled open the door. He was dressed in a black jumper and a pair of thick pants and looking down at her with a knowing expression on his face. She wondered if he knew the conversation he had just interrupted. She had no desire for him to hear her eleven year old son giving her dating advice.

"Hey," she said, knowing that her face was most likely a shade of pink only children of the eighties approved of.

He pulled open the door completely, letting her and Teddy walk through. He closed the door behind them. She took of her coat and scarf and hung it on the coat hanger and Teddy followed suit.

"How was service?" he asked, watching her closely.

She shrugged. "Like a funeral service. There wasn't much crying though, except Teddy here." She messed up her son's hair.

"No I wasn't, you were the one crying..." Severus looked down at Teddy and sneered.

"Somehow I believe him, Nymphadora. You have a dismal track record." Severus said with a teasing tone in his voice. Tonks punched him playfully on his arm.

"How come you call her Nymphadora?" Teddy asked looking up at Severus.

He seemed surprised by the question. "Because it's her name," he said.

"Well everyone else calls her Tonks. You are the only person who I have ever head call her that."

Severus seemed to be searching for a reason as to why he called her that. She, herself, wasn't sure why he did. She looked him and raised one eyebrow. "Well," she said, urging him to answer.

He pressed his thumb on his chin. "I suppose it's because she is the only Nymphadora I know. Your mother is a singular creature and she deserves a name that is as odd as her."

Teddy grinned and looked up at her and raised an eyebrow. She had no idea why he found that so amusing. "Teddy," she said. "Why don't you go watch some TV in the living room."

"He has a TV."

"The best one," Severus replied, folding his arms.

"Cool."

Teddy took off to the living room and she followed Severus into the kitchen. He put a kettle on the stove and took out some tea bags. "Does that child drink tea?"

She shook her head. "No, what sort of kid drinks tea?"

"Coffee then?"

She laughed. "He drinks cocoa."

"Oh, I don't have any of that."

"I'm not surprised," she laughed. "He'll get something when we head home."

"Are you leaving soon then?" His monotone was in full effect. It was almost impossible to tell what he was thinking. Did he want her to stay? Did he want her to go?

She unconsciously passed her finger over a spot her neck that was aching since the morning. He leaned against the counter watching her. She watched him watching her, gazing intently at spot as she passed her finger slowly over it. She felt her stomach tie up in knots. "What?" she whispered.

He sneered at her. "Is that a slag tag?"

"Huh?"

"Extra-curricular activities, I see." He turned his back to her and began to busy himself by taking out tea cups.

"Sev, it's not a slag tag," she said defensively.

"It isn't?" he asked turning off the kettle. He turned and looked at her, reading the expression on her face and turned back around and began to pour the steaming water into the cups. "So what's wrong with you then; why do look like you had someone sucking on your neck."

She was almost caught off guard by the use of the word 'sucking'. It seemed very sexual. She accepted the tea he handed her and sat down at the dining table that was in the kitchen. "I don't know what it is, when I woke up it was there. Maybe it's an insect bite."

"Awfully big for an insect bite," he said taking a seat next to her.

"What exactly are you insinuating?" she asked.

"I'm not insinuating anything." He said flatly.

"Yes you were. You're trying to say that I am with some bloke."

"Well If you knew what I was insinuating, then why did you ask?" He took a sip of his tea.

She added a spoonful of sugar to hers from the table. "Not that it's any of your concern but I am not bedding any blokes. I really think something bit me."

"I never said it was any of my concern, I'm just saying that maybe you want to set an example for your son."

Her jaw dropped. "Take that back," she demanded

"What?" he asked, like it was ridiculous to even suggest it.

"How dear you suggest that I'm... I haven't been with a man in years..."

He swallowed his tea with a gulp and stared straight ahead. She scolded her self for revealing so much about herself to him. There probably wasn't anything more embarrassing than giving her sexual history to someone she was interested in. She pushed the tea away form her and got up from the table.

"Wait," he said taking hold of her hand. "I'm sorry," he said quickly.

She looked down at him. He said he was sorry. That itself was a massive step for him. She squeezed his hands in hers. "I'm not with any one, okay," she said. He nodded. She sat back down but he was still holding her hand. Even as she took a sip of the tea with her free hand he hadn't released it. She enjoyed the feeling of sitting next to him with their hands intertwined like that. Even the slightest touch was enough to send sparks up her body. She gazed down at their hands, thinking all the while how much she missed sharing smiles and things like that with someone.

-o-o-

After spending less than half and hour at Severus' place she and Teddy apparated away from his house and to hers.

"Mum," Teddy said.

"Hmm," she answered.

"Why were you and your friend arguing so much? I could here you from the kitchen."

"Just a misunderstanding."

"About what?" he asked.

"Adult matters." She said shortly.

He followed her into the kitchen.

"It's because he thinks you have a slag tag, isn't it?"

She turned around at stared at him. "Why are listening in on other people's conversations. I thought I taught you better than that." She wondered exactly how much he heard.

"I wasn't listening in; you could hear it loud and clear from the living room."

So he heard everything, great. She put the kettle on and turned and looked at him. "Next time cork your ears."

He nodded. "Just one more thing," he said, now walking behind her as she left the kitchen. "When it got all quiet for a while, were you two kissing?"

She stopped in her tracks. Her eyes went wide. "I did no such thing. Severus has a girlfriend, you know that." He walked from behind her and into the front of her. He had a knowing smile on his face, the same kind Remus used to get.

"But you like him, I can tell. You were nervous and your face went all pink."

"No I wasn't!" she said defensively, knowing that it was a blatant lie.

He shook his head. "It's okay mum, I think he likes you too."

Despite the fact that she was slightly alarmed that her son was so nosey she couldn't help but love him. She knew he was just saying nice things to her but she still appreciated it.

A/N: Okay, I know this chapter seemed a little bland but I assure you there was a reason for it.

Hey, I'm going to give you guys a little bit of homework. Yes, you have to work while reading this.

To better appreciate the next chapter, I think you should check out this video on you tube: It features' Alan Rickman and it's awesome: It's a song called In Demand it's by the group Texas. That's what my 49 year old Snape looks like, so you can get a good picture in your head and it will really help with later chapters as well. Here's the link: http// www. youtube. com/ watch?vG7AbJFZNXE.

You can just remove the spaces in the address or go look for the video yourself. Either way, you should watch it, especially if you like Rickman's Snape.

If you have seen this already then you know why I like it.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thanks for the reviews and thanks to Amy, my beta.

CHAPTER: Life of the living

Severus Snape was the most impossible man to seduce!

When she was younger, she would never worry about a bloke fancying her or not. If she wanted him, she would go after him. However, the daring nerve of her twenties disappeared with child bearing. Now she preferred safe and time tried methods, but unfortunately for her, none of them were working. She knew that the key to man's heart was his stomach, so she cooked for him. She made him cakes, puddings, and pies and he _still_ did not seem to want her. She next decided complimenting him. This was no easy task as he was the only man in the history of the world who _did not _like to be complimented, especially on his physical attributes and he _certainly_ did not offer her any in return. Next, she tried changing her appearance for him, this too did not get the reaction she was hoping her. He treated her all the same whether she was blond or brunette. The only thing left to try was to openly throw herself at him, but even that plan troubled her. He was the kind of man who would throw her back if he didn't want her.

That was another problem. He was the king of mixed messages. There were times when she was certain that he was interested in her and then in a matter of seconds she would think that she was crazy to think that he was. Everything that he did evoked two emotions in her, hope and despair.

Even watching Frasier wasn't entertaining for her anymore, because now she was always thinking about ways she could touch him, or get him to touch her. The simplest way to ensure the most amount of touching without running the risk of him seeing her true motives was to pretend to be tired and lay down beside him. The couch was big, but it wasn't big enough to prevent their bodies from touching. She hated to admit that he was skilled at avoiding all the good parts from touching, the parts that would make diagnoses of his reception to her advances much easier.

They were in this position on the couch when she felt him put his hand around her waist. Of course, it was impossible to tell if he was even aware that he did it or if he thought anything of it, but Tonks thought that it was a good sign. She decided that she wouldn't let his hand rest there; she turned her body so she was laying on her back and she looked up at him. His eyes were on the TV, not her.

"Sev," she said.

"Hmm," he answered.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

His eyes dropped to look at her. "You can ask it, I can't guarantee that I will answer it."

She nodded. "I was wondering... I mean you never told me... how come you're here." He blinked, his eyes suddenly looked darker than usual, like she had taken him to place that he wasn't keen on going. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to." She wasn't expecting him to answer, but he started talking and when he did he was still looking in her eyes.

"I felt like I was on a bridge," he said. "There were walls stopping me from going either way; I couldn't go left of right."

"What happened?" she breathed.

"I woke up."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that. Of course, I had lost a considerable amount of blood and I was very weak. But, I was able to summon what I needed out of my dungeons, and I always carried dittany on my person."

"So why did you go in hiding. Why didn't you just announce you were alive."

He closed his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose. "And return to what?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Friends."

"I have only had one friend in my life, and even in death I couldn't access her."

"So you created a new life?" she asked.

He looked down at her. "Something like that. I wanted to think things over, to figure out why I didn't die... I wanted to... I was ready to... but yet I wouldn't."

She bit her lip trying to resist the urge to hold onto him like a wounded child. "Have you figured it out?"

He looked away from her and got a far away look on his face. "I think I wasn't able to die because I couldn't be sorted. How can you judge someone who was alive for thirty eight years but really lived only five of them?"

"So, you're alive to live," she whispered. She took his hand that around her and held it in hers. She placed it over her heart. "I understand you perfectly," she said. "You're making a life for yourself, one with friends and lovers and..." She was going to say kids but decided against it. She didn't know if he ever wanted kids. "And Frasier."

He saw the side of his lips twitch upwards slightly. "Exactly" he said.

She held his hand against her chest, feeling it rise and sink. She wanted him to kiss her; she was wishing it. She figured that if she thought on it hard enough he would actually hear them aloud.

He looked down at her. His brows were now knitted in concentration, like he was having a silent argument with himself.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I was wondering why you never remarried."

She was not expecting him to ask her a question about herself and certainly not about her love life. She never actually sat down and thought about why she was doing what she was doing, things just sort of fell into place that way. Everything seemed to fit one way, so she went with it. That was until recently. He was evoking feelings in her that she forgot she was capable of having. Sometimes she felt like a teenager around him, with little butterflies in her stomach, sometimes she felt like a restless young woman, who wanted nothing more than to share a warm bed with someone but most of the times he made her long for companionship, something she never expected to long for again.

She looked in his eyes, ready to share the inner workings of her mind with him. "When Remus died, I poured all my attention into Teddy. I didn't have time to date anyone else and I wasn't ready to. After a while I forgot about it."

"But how do you feel now that he is in school and you don't have to watch over him all the time."

She shrugged. "I think that's why the older you get the more you need familiar people around, someone who can take you back to a place and time that has gone, someone to make the transition easier. I miss my son all the time these days but, it is good to have distractions."

"Am I distraction?" he asked.

She nodded and smiled lightly. "A distraction at first but after a while you sort of managed to become a compliment."

"A compliment?"

"Yes, to my otherwise dull and mundane days."

"Is that a good thing?"

"A great thing."

He gazed at her with a look that was completely new, like he was seeing her for the first time. He turned her body around and wrapped his arms around her, all the while keeping hold of her hands. She felt him lean forward and kissed her cheek. His lips felt so smooth against her skin, and made it tingle on the spot where it touched. She closed her eyes to let the feeling sink into her. She never opened them again that night. She stayed there and fell asleep next to him.

They woke up next to each other for the first time.

-o-o-

In her mind, they had a breakthrough. She guessed it was some vain hope she had that he would begin to distance himself from Wendy and spend more time with her. So, the very next day, when she was over to his place, the only thing he could think to say to her was something about Wendy, she felt her heart sink.

This was one of the times were she felt like a silly teenage girl. She wanted him and she couldn't tell him, because he wanted someone else. She didn't lie down next to him. Instead, she sat in the chair like normal people did and listened to every fantastic thing he had to say about Wendy. Now he was speaking about the fact that she was a walking history book.

She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, a mannerism she was learning from him.

"What's wrong with you, you look tired."

After all the nice things he said about Wendy, all he could say was that she looked tired. She got up from the couch. "I have to go." She turned her back to him. She had no idea when it started but she was actually crying. She could not let him see her crying for no apparent reason.

"Are you ill?" he asked. He sounded concerned.

"Ah... something like that. I'll see you around." She didn't wait to hear what he had to say. Instead, she disapparated right away with a POP.

Once in her living room she walked to her bedroom and crawled up on the bed and hugged her pillow tightly, letting her tears fall.

A/N: Okay, so I hope you guys liked this chapter. I know that you will like the next one and you will want to kill me at the end...haha. Look out for it on Monday.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Thanks to Amy for reading it and fixing it up and to my reviewers.

CHAPTER: Fighting.

The only thing Tonks liked about Wendy was her predictable nature. Every night she could be one hundred percent sure that she would not be visiting Severus, or stopping by, or calling on the phone or anything like that. When the sun went down, she ceased to exist. This is was something that Tonks thought would work in her favour as people were generally more open to romance under to blanket of the night. However, when it came to her, it didn't seem to matter. Even when they turned off the TV and just sat with a bottle of wine talking about everything and anything, things didn't change and even when they started to venture out for dinner it didn't change. Sometimes she felt as if they were more like a couple that he was with Wendy, but she didn't know what he was like with her, or if he gave her more attention that he ever paid Wendy.

It wasn't a total hopeless case, as she could tell that at the least he did care about her. If she got sick, he would visit her, if she was sad, he would comfort her, which was really ironic, because he was the biggest reason she was so sad all the time. The more time she spent with him, and the closer they got, the more apparent it would be that they were destined to be nothing but friends.

Sometimes when she woke up next to him, she would fool herself into thinking that they could more, but then she would be snapped back into reality by the fact that Wendy usually visited him when she came home from work. She hated that the woman didn't seem to sleep. How could she spend the day with Severus and then work at night? When she pointed this out to him, he didn't seem bothered by it. When she told Harry, he thought she was just looking for faults. Yet, it worried her. From her calculations, Wendy only got, at most, five hours of sleep everyday. It was only a matter of time before she snapped from exhaustion or broke out into shingles. At least that was what Tonks was hoping for: some sort of mental break down because there seemed to be no way that anything would go wrong with her physically.

Maybe it was karma but the more she wished bad on Wendy, the worse things would get for Tonks. Besides the fainting spells that started to happen occasionally, she was still getting weird red marks on her skin. They were common enough for Severus not to question their presence. He actually started to agree that there might have been an insect attacking her. The marks lasted about four days but by then a new one would have popped up elsewhere.

It was a Friday night, and she had Severus had planned to go out for dinner, when she found herself standing in front of him, with her blouse brought up so her hips were visible to him. He passed his finger over the red spot and she felt a slight ache that reminded her of sex, she didn't know if it was real of imagined.

"You got this last night?" he asked looking up at her.

She nodded. "Yes, and I'm feeling sort of faint again."

He leaned back and sighed. "And you absolutely refuse to go to St. Mungo's."

"I know I'm not sick," she complained. She put her blouse back down and sat next to him on the couch.

"You just said you were feeling faint."

"I am, but it's not because I'm sick. I know when I'm sick and I'm not sick. It's just some damn insect that won't leave me alone."

"You have never seen this insect? I spent the night at your place before and I never saw anything coming through your window that would leave that mark."

"So what do you think it is then…" she asked challengingly.

"Well," he said looking at her as he spoke. "I don't think it's anything."

She rolled her eyes. "It's has to be something."

He shook his head. "Wendy has done extensive reading in psychiatry."

She held up her hand to interject. "Sev, if you're about to recite her bloody resume I'd rather not hear it."

He ignored her rudeness. "She feels that your wounds may be self-inflicted…"

Her brows rose. "Self-inflicted? Like I did this myself?!"

"That is what the word means."

She had never been so insulted in her entire life. Tonks had been called many things but never a psychopath. "Why is she trying to poison your mind against me?"

"That's not what she's trying to do, besides I'm a grown man and I can think for myself."

She folded her arms. "Do you believe her?" she asked in a whisper.

He paused. "It does appear strange that you only get…"

She cut him off. "Oh my god, you believe her! I can't believe you!" This was the first time that he had ever said something that genuinely hurt her feelings.

He took her arm, trying to calm her down or explain himself. "Nymphadora, if you can give me a reason why you only get these marks on your skin when you're alone at night then…"

"I can't explain it… so what now… do you think I'm crazy."

"No."

"That's what you said."

"No, I said that maybe you might be doing this to yourself but it doesn't mean that I think you're crazy."

She pulled her arm away from him and stood up. "I'm going to leave now… I'll check on you tomorrow to see if you figured out WHAT THE HELL YOU JUST SAID TO ME."

-o-o-

"I'm sorry," he said.

She brought her brows together and looked in his eyes. He had become very good at apologising, sometimes he apologized even though he wasn't sure why he was apologizing. He just seemed to think that it was the right thing to say to her. On most instances it would work but the insult was so great that she couldn't let it slide just like that. She wasn't ready to cosy up on his couch and watch Frasier.

"I'll accept it, even though I'm not entirely sure that I buy it."

He frowned. "What's not to buy, I said I was sorry."

"Yes, but I'm sure you still believe I'm crazy."

"I never said you were crazy," he complained.

She rolled her eyes and left his place for hers in a POP.

-o-o-

"Okay," he said. "Why don't _you_ tell me what it is you want me to say?"

"I want you to say that you're sorry."

He held up his hand. "I said that yesterday."

"But you didn't mean it."

He nodded. "On the contrary, I did. Do you think that you are pleasant when you are angry?"

"Well you're still not getting it," she said in frustration. "You apologised for saying what you said but you haven't apologised for believing it."

He got a stern look on his face. He pressed the bridge of his nose between two fingers. "I admit that I should have known better than to question your… ah… mental stability."

She nodded. "Thank you." She said.

He sighed as if it had been weighing on him. "Watching this show has been dreadfully boring without you. Don't you want to see if how much Niles gets in the divorce?"

She guessed that it was an invitation to join him, but something told her that she shouldn't. She had been spending all her time with him, and it all seemed to be in vain. He didn't know her well enough to tell the she was sane. There she was, memorising every word he ever said, movement he made and habits he had and he was just looking for a buddy to watch his favourite TV show, even if it was a crazy person.

She pinned her hair behind her ears. "No, I already have plans."

He looked incredulous. "Plans?"

"You're not the only one with a life you know," she snapped back.

He was clearly not willing to get in another argument with her. "Do as you please, I don't care."

She rolled her eyes at him and disappeared with a POP

-o-o-

The fact that he said he didn't care angered her deeply. She held out on going back to place for another four days. The more she was away from him, the more she realised that she wanted to be with him even more. She wanted nothing more than for him to come to senses and give himself to her. She knew that she would be good for him, she already was. He was already in a much better state than she found him.

She apparated into his house and realised that the TV was off. She went in the kitchen to look for him. He was sitting at the table, watching a kettle boil. Tonks knew that he knew she was there.

"Hey," she said.

He didn't turn to look at her. "What are you doing here, don't you have plans?"

"Yes, but I stopped by to check on you."

He turned around. "Check on me, am I child, Nympahdora, or a chore. I would prefer if you would not bother coming at all."

She bit her lip. "You know that's not how I meant it. "

He shooed her away. "Go be with who ever is a good compliment to your life these days." He went back to his kettle and turned it off. He took out a cup from the cupboard and poured the hot water into it. He took out a tea bag and added it to the tea. He took the cup of tea and sat at the table, watching the steam rise out of it. He didn't look at her again.

"Fine," she said. She turned around to walk away but in a matter of seconds he was holding onto her arm. She turned to him. "What?"

"That's all you have to say for yourself," he grunted.

"Excuse me."

"Nymphadora, you have been trying my patience on purpose."

He couldn't even begin to comprehend how ironic that statement was to her. She could feel her blood boiling, which was never a good a sign. She was not pretty when she was angry.

She shoved him away from her violently; he stumbled trying to maintain his balance. He seemed surprised by the force she used.

"How dare you say that I have been testing your patience when it is you who have been testing mine."

"Trust me Nymphadora, I have the patience of a saint when it comes to you," he replied, and he was as angry as her.

She heard a laugh escape her lips. "It must be very difficult having someone who is willing to cook for you, spend her entire night with you, and appreciate you for all your eccentricities. It must be very difficult knowing that you can get away with not giving a DAMN about what that person wants."

She felt tears falling down her cheeks; she was overwhelmed with emotion that she felt her entire body going numb and weak. His expression changed. He looked confused.

"I don't know what you want Nymphadora,"

She shook her head. She was saying it between sobs. "Why can't you figure it out, isn't it obvious, haven't I made it plain?"

The look on his face told her that she hadn't. She sighed in defeat as he was going to force her to say it.

"I want _you,_ Severus," she whispered, "and I want _you_ to want _me_."

A/N: Yes folks, it's a clifhanger... Muhahaha.

Sameera: I know you would have liked it to move slower but I can't. I'm really trying to complete this is a good amount of time so I have to speed up them getting togther. I don't know if I should tell you guys but the story does not end when they get together because we all know it's going to happen. There's a twist in there eventaully. There's going to be some chapters after that. I'm not sure. I estimate that there are about five chapters left. Please don't come down to hard on me. I guarantee you will like it. (okay I can't guarantee that you will like it but I have the idea in my head and it's pretty good so..."


	11. Chapter 11

A**/N: Thanks to Amy and my reviewers.**

**Rating change…**

**But I still tried to keep it as clean as possible with out just skipping everything.**

CHAPTER: Making up.

"I don't know what you want Nymphadora," he said genuinely.

She shook her head. She was saying it between sobs. "Why can't you figure it out, isn't it obvious, haven't I made it plain?"

The look on his face told her that she hadn't. She sighed in defeat as he was going to force her to say it.

"I want _you_ Severus," she whispered, "and I want _you_ to want _me_."

-o-

Tonks stood there staring at his black eyes, her chest was heaving rhythmically, and tears were streaking her face. She was looking for some sign that she shouldn't be embarrassed about her feelings, or the fact that she told him about them. She was looking for some sign that he returned them. She wanted him to say that he felt the physical and emotional connection that lingered between them, the same connection that made wanting to touch him seem second nature, or the connection that allowed them to sit next to each other and act like kids without feeling embarrassed by the fact that they were both adults or the connection that made holding hands seems equivalent to making love.

It was always in her to be positive, but how could she be when he was looking back at her with eyes like an empty void, like there was nothing there.

Vision blurred from the tears, she nodded, and tried to bring a smile on her face to show him that, despite the fact that she was crying, it really wasn't that important to her. "I'll leave now," she mumbled.

She allowed herself to be transported through space, the pulling in her navel pulled her farther away form Severus and hope.

She landed in her house, in the valley that seemed million of miles away from him. Her knees felt weak under her. It was giving way to her crushed heart; she was falling on her knees slowly.

But she would never touch the ground. She could feel herself being lifted up. A firm but gentle hand brought her to her feet.

She smelled him before she saw him. For the rest of her life, that scent would remind her of him; a mixture of what she guessed was aftershave and his natural scent that would ensnare her senses.

"Severus," she said. But, he didn't speak, instead he made a 'shh-ing' noise in her ear. Then, in one quick motion, his hands were on the small of her back, pulling her closer to him until the only thing between then was their clothes. She felt his lips, soft and smooth, tracing a kiss from her cheeks to her lips.

The moment it happened, she felt like everything around her was in complete haze; the only things that existed in that moment were the two of them and the layer of clothes keeping them apart.

The feel of his tongue entering her mouth and intertwining with hers was a compliment to the sensation of his hands travelling down her body, to her thighs. He lifter her leg and wrapped it around his torso; she followed suit with the other, while wrapping her arms around his shoulders for support. She wasn't worried about her weight because she knew that he was deceptively strong.

She felt him withdrawing from the kiss giving her an opportunity to see his eyes for the first time since he came to her. They were different; there was nothing unreadable or ambiguous about them. For the first time she could see plainly: he wanted her.

For some reason, he felt it necessary to ask him what he wanted. "Do you want to spend the night, she mumbled.

He said a definite _yes_.

-o-

She stood before him dressed as he sat on her bed. He pulled her closer to him by her waist. He began to undo the button on her jeans, fumbling with it a bit, before he got it apart. She couldn't help but he amused by the fact that he seemed nervous. She passed her hands trough his hair, letting the fingers touch the scalp.

He tugged on the jeans until only her underwear was exposed. In the back of her mind, she was thankful that she chose to wear a black pair tonight. She could feel her stomach tying up in knots at the realisation that what she had been hoping for was finally happening.

"Take off your top," he demanded. It was the first thing he said in a long while and she didn't feel like disobeying. She began to undo the buttons until her bra was exposed.

She felt him pull her jeans down to her knees. She stepped out of it.

"The bra," he said. She took it to mean that he wanted that off too and she complied.

She felt his hands sneak under the seams of her underwear, massaging the spot where it rested. He pulled them down slowly, until they fell on their own. She stepped out of them. She bit her lips in the excitement, as his eyes roamed over her naked body, like geographer surveying a piece of land he was about to plot.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered as if her body awed him. She was resisting every urge in her body to rip his clothes off because he was fully dressed.

-o-

He was on top of her, doing all the work with his tongue and his hands. He was still dressed, testing her patience. She tried to reach for the button of his pants but he took her hands and pinned them over her head. She felt like she was near the edge and all she needed was a little poke to be sent flying in the wind. It was delightfully infuriating.

"Sev," she said, finding herself begging…

Just as the word left her mouth, she felt him entering her slowly. She was completely caught off guard, as she suddenly felt his naked body against hers, touching every part of her there was.

She dug her nails into his back and moaned in his shoulder, trying to resist the urge to scream in delight. She felt like she was flying.

**A/N: Finalmente!!!**

**So I decided that Snape needed to do something sort of odd. Then I thought: Ah… I'll make him keep his clothes on until the very last moment.**


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Thanks again for the reviews. I'm surprised U didn't get flamed for that one.

Anyway, another thanks to Amy.

CHAPTER: Guilt.

Tonks laid in bed with her head rested on his bare chest. She was running her finger in a straight line down his chest and resting on his navel, before moving her finger back up his body and resting it on his Adam's apple.

The sun was peeking through the window, but neither of them made any attempt to move. He laid next to her with one of his hands placed just under her breast and the other behind his neck.

"Sev," she said, and he moved his hands up farther up her body to indicate that he was listening. "Can I ask you a personal question?"

"Is there anything personal between us anymore?"

A smile spread on her face and she bit her lips. "Before last night, did you ever think about me… you know sexually?"

He sighed slowly. She felt his other hand begin to stroke her hair and she closed her eyes at he sensation of his long fingers touching her scalp and then slipping away trough the strands of her disheveled hair. "Honestly, I thought about it all time."

This certainly surprised her because there were times when she did things to him that would have caused any man to get aroused and he never once reacted to her physically.

"Always or was there a specific time when it started?" she asked. She felt like she needed to know, to get a sense of how long he wanted it or she could gage if he felt the same about her.

"That night when you laughed at the idea so much… I kept thinking about it, and I guess I never stopped."

She giggled slightly. "It seemed funny then… but once I stopped laughing I realized that it really wasn't funny at all. The longer it was in my head the more it made sense."

"That was very cruel, by the way…" he said.

She kissed him on his chest letting her tongue touch his skin. It was her way of apologizing.

"_That_ was very cruel by the way," he repeated with amusement in his voice.

She laughed. "And you, I was practically throwing myself at you and you never once reacted to me physically."

"There are so many spells…"

She smacked him with her palms. "Do you have any idea how much easier this would have been for me."

"Well, it would have been far easier for both of us if you had just opened your mouth and said something."

-o-

"TONKS," she heard someone calling her name from outside the house. It sounded like Harry. He knocked on the door. She wrapped her bath robe around her and turned to Severus, who was pulling a T- shirt on.

"It's Harry," she said.

"Why is Harry calling on you at this hour? It's hardly seven o'clock yet," he looked around the room searching for something. "Have you seen my wand?" he asked.

The knocking continued. "You can use mine." She said pointing at hers on the table. He took it up and felt it his hands before he waved it, causing his hair that was still wet from the shower they had taken, to dry instantly.

The knocking continued.

"Bloody hell that boy is persistent," he mumbled. "Maybe you should just go see what he wants."

She nodded and left the room pulling in the door. She walked to the front door and pulled it open. Harry stood there with a suspicious look on his face. "Hello Harry," she said. "I was just in the shower."

"Hey Tonks," he said. He walked in the house, inviting himself in. He walked in the living room and began to look round. "I'm looking for Snape, is he here?"

The first thing that entered her mind was to lie. Harry was smart enough to be able to deduce that if Severus was at her house this early in the morning, then they most likely spent the night together. "He's not here; maybe you should check his place obviously."

He looked at her with his eyes squinting through his spectacles. "I've been to his place, he's not there."

Tonks shrugged. "Well if I see him later, I can pass on the message; did you have something important to tell him?"

Harry gazed at her for a while as if waiting for her to recant her statements. She pinned her hair behind her ears and looked in another direction than his green eyes.

"I needed his help with potion I have to brew. I was wondering if he could write some notes for it. It's sort of new so it might take him a while… I don't know how his brain works." Harry reached in his cloak and took out a piece of parchment that was folded and handed it to Tonks. She opened it and saw it was instructions for a potion that was extremely difficult and that she herself would not have liked to brew. She folded it back up and smiled at Harry. "I'll be sure to give him this when I see him…later."

Harry then sighed and threw his hands up frustration. "I know this is none of my business and I am totally out of place for saying this but… it needs to be said. When I went to Professor Snape's house this morning and he wasn't there I thought he would be by Wendy's. since she's his girlfriend and all. Anyway, she seemed very upset and on the verge of tears. I just want the two of you think about what you are doing. because she is a genuinely nice person and you two are being unfair to her…" He stood there and stared at her waiting for a response.

She shifted from one foot to the other. She had no idea why she kept on lying. "Harry, Severus, isn't…"

"Here is his wand," Harry said, and he summoned his wand that was on the couch into his hand. "Snape would never leave his wand just anywhere."

She stood there with arms folded. They had been caught.

"Well, I just wasn't expecting this from you Tonks, and certainly not Severus either, considering what he showed me… But like I said, it's none of my business but I just wanted you two to know that she knows… okay." With that he rolled his eyes and apparated from her house with a POP.

Tonks walked back to the room feeling like she was walking back to the dorms from a long detention. She opened to door to find Severus sitting on the bed leaning back with his hands supporting his weight. "Harry wanted you to help with this," she said lamely. She knew he had heard the entire conversation but she still handed him the potion.

He took it with a frown on his face. "Is he sure he wants my help, I thought he was coming with a stake, flambeau and a pitchfork."

"I'm sorry," she said. "It's my fault really."

"No, don't say that. I wanted to and I'm not going to pretend that if placed in the same situation I wouldn't do it again."

Maybe he didn't know how much this was her fault. She was the one who was perusing him, knowing fully well that he was seeing someone and really didn't care or thought about her feelings.

"I should tell her," he said sighing.

"She already knows, apparently."

"I should explain," he said.

She knew she should be feeling guiltier about it but she wasn't. The only thing she felt guilty about was the fact that Severus felt guilty. She knew she wanted him, and there was only one way to get him and that was behind Wendy's back. Maybe there was a bit of the Black's attitude in her.

"Maybe we should cool it off for a while until I get this whole thing sorted out."

Her heart fell in her stomach. "Does this mean that you've changed you mind?"

He looked at her, her eyes did nothing to hide her panic. "No, my mind is definitely made up; I can't be in two relationships at the same time."

"Well leave her! Just tell her that we are together now."

He shook his head. He didn't seem offended by how she was simplifying how he should do it. "You can't end a relationship with someone in one conversation and even If you could, I don't think I would, it's a cruel thing to do… I need time."

"How long?" she asked.

He took her hand. "Not too long."

"So, are you going now?" she said looking in his eyes.

He nodded. "I think it's best I do."

-o-

Tonks found herself tossing and turning in her sleep. The room was pitch black. The only visible source of light was the moon shining in her window that was shut tight and the sealed.

She opened her eyes and found herself looking at a strange sight, something orange… a ball of fire, was descending down the hills and into the valley. It was tiny in the distance, but it kept moving closer and closer, getting larger and larger until it was hovering outside her window. The fire, which seemed to have a mind of it own, moved closer to the house until it was seeping through the tiny spaces in the boards, like water. It hovered over her menacingly. But nothing happened; instead Tonks found herself drifting into sleep, the fire's comfortable warmth overtook her.

A/N: Yes, people Severus did cheat on Wendy. It wasn't one of those things where he was trying to make Tonks jealous and had Wendy's cooperation all along and it wasn't that he and Wendy were just friends… No, he acted like man and cheated on her… It's horrible, I know, but don't think it will take away from his relationship with Tonks… it wouldn't.

I used this for two reasons; I wanted to create a parallel between Lily James and Severus. The only thing is that Severus is the Lily in this one. I know Lily never cheated on Snape because they were never dating but I see her going with James, Snape's worst enemy as emotional cheating. I guess you can figure out Tonks is the James and poor old Wendy is Snape. It was meant to show that… it happens.

Well the other reason was to get Tonks alone at night for one more time.

Harry is being a little out of place isn't he… But someone had to get them to feel guilty because they just didn't want to on their own, especially Tonks.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: So this chpater is fixed, thanks to my beta reader Amy. A huge thanks to her because she is busy and I have been bombarding her with chappies.

CHAPTER: Taking Potions.

Tonks woke up to the soothing sensation of her hair being lightly stroked. She opened her eyes to see the source of the pleasure and found herself looking in the black pair of Severus'. "Hey," she said.

"Nymphadora, how are you feeling?"

Just then she remembered that she woke up a while ago and went back to sleep, because she was still very tired and weak. She tried to sit up but found her head was spinning and room was coming in and out of focus. "I feel horrible," she commented. She tried to lift her hand to her head, but it felt like it was being held down by a ton of bricks. "I don't feel so good," she said mumbled to him.

His brows came together and he held the bridge of his nose between his fingers. "You need to go St. Mungo's, no arguing this time."

"I'm fine; I just need a little rest."

He frowned. "You haven't seen yourself yet. You look very clammy and your neck is bruised purple."

She tired to lift her hand to her neck but again it felt too heavy for her to carry. She simply turned her head away from him so she didn't have to look at his scolding eyes. "I can't go St. Mungo's," she said.

"Oh yes, and why not, may I ask?"

"I don't have the strength to apparate, and you can't take me because you'll out yourself."

His silence suggested that he was thinking about it. He sighed. "I'll be back in a minute; try not to get in any trouble while I'm gone."

She heard him POP out of the room, and she closed her eyes wanting nothing more than to go to sleep.

-o-

"What's wrong with her," she heard Harry's voice say after two POPs filled the room.

"If I had known I would have treated her myself," Severus said clearly annoyed. "Did you bring the potion?"

"Yeah, it's enough for 24 hours."

She opened her eyes and looked at them. "What potion, I'm not taking any potion."

"Relax," Severus said. "The potion is for me, it's polyjuice."

Harry moved closer to the bed. "What's that on her neck?"

"That's what we have been trying to figure out for three months now. It started appearing on her skin around Christmas, although it has never been this bad before."

"So when did she start to get like this?" Harry asked. From the expression on her face, she could tell that he was concerned about her heath and her appearance.

"I haven't been here in two days. When I came tonight, I found her like this."

Harry nodded. She hated that they were discussing her like she wasn't there. "Well you should take the potion and move her as soon as possible."

"Wait," Tonks said in a more feeble voice than she expected. "I didn't give anyone permission to move me. I'm fine." She tried to get up to prove her point, but she found that she couldn't move much at all.

Harry looked at her and then to Severus. "What's she got against hospitals, anyway?"

He shrugged and began to sprinkle some hairs in a canister. "I don't know, but if she had listened to me in the first place she wouldn't have been in this mess…"

-o-

The face looking back at her did not resemble Severus' but she could still see his eyes shining through the blue ones he had now. She had no idea whose hair he put in the polyjuice, but whoever it was, he must not have known that he man had very expressive features. Every little emotion that Severus was feeling showed on his face.

The healers were fussing a great deal over her. She wasn't sure if it was because Harry had brought her in, or because they were genuinely concerned about her condition.

"She's lost a lot of blood," the Healer said to Harry of all people.

"Where?" Harry asked.

"Through that bruise I'm guessing, though we don't know how."

"You don't know how?" Severus asked clearly annoyed.

The nurse was taken aback by the tone he had used with her. Though he looked different his deep menacing voice remained the same. "Ah… we have a list of creatures that extract blood from the bodies, all of them are very unlikely because the marks are so different."

"So it's obviously not a vampire?" Harry said. Tonks could tell that he decided to speak instead of Severus, because his eyes were glaring at the woman with the fires of a thousand suns.

She looked happy that someone asked a question that she could answer. "You see a vampire leaves two puncture marks on the neck. This wound has no puncture marks and she said she has gotten them in other places; her arms, stomach and legs. So it can't be a vampire."

"Can it be an animal creature then?" Harry asked.

"Well that seems unlikely," she said again, her four assistants behind her nodding in agreement. "Your friend told us that she only gets the marks when she is alone, at night and asleep and she said that she can't remember how she got them. So it has to be a being of near or equal to human intelligence to know when she is alone and be able to obliviate her memory."

Severus was holding the bridge of his nose between his fingers. "Madame, is there anyone here who possesses more than basic common sense working here?" he asked.

Harry turned his head towards him and then looked apologetically to the nurses. "Never mind him, he's in anger management classes."

"Well we're doing our best. We'll give her a blood replenishing potion for the weakness and a …" The nurse was nudged in the stomach to stop her from saying the other potion she was about to administer. "Right," she said in realization. "Can we speak to the patient alone?"

Harry and Snape looked at each other.

"Tonks sat up slowly. "I'd prefer if they stay."

"Miss Tonks, I think it would be best if they left the room," she said.

Tonks hated hospitals and she hated being alone in them, they air was thick with the scent of death. She didn't want Severus to leave her side. "I'd prefer not to be alone."

The head nurse looked at her and sighed. "Very well…"

She went to the cupboard in the room that housed basic medical potions and remedies and took out a dark red bottle and a vessel that looked like a miniature goblet. She poured a deep red liquid out of the bottle and into the vessel and brought it over to Tonks, she held it in front of her.

As he hand held it, it seemed so heavy even though it was so small. She was still feeling very weak and she could now see how clammy and discolored her skin looked. Severus sat on the bed next to her, took the potion from her hands, and moved it to her lips. She hated that they were in a room full of people who were witnessing such a tender moment. She was especially worried about Harry, who was against any relationship they might have had on the whole.

"That taste like crap," she complained.

"The important ones always do." Severus said.

The nurse emerged from the cupboards with another tiny goblet carrying a potion that was a bright purple color on top and blue haze at the bottom. She handed it to Severus. He held it up and looked at it. He clearly had never seen this potion in his life. "What is this?" he asked the nurse.

"A potion." The top nurse commented.

"Yes, I can see that, but what type of potion is it?" he asked evidently annoyed. He sniffed it. "It smells like lavender."

"We know," she said.

The fact that there was a potion that he didn't know seemed to scare him. He continued to look at her, waiting for further explanation.

"It's a new potion… very special."

"What are the properties?"

"Can't say," she said with a smile. "However we can assure you that we do not administer potions that the patient doesn't need. It's a matter of confidentiality."

He seemed in two minds about it but the nurses looked very insistent. He moved the goblet to her lips, and she swallowed the potion slowly. It tasted like strawberries and left a tingling feeling in the bit of her stomach.

"What does it taste like?" he asked.

She could tell this was his attempt to fish out what the potion was, since they refused to tell him. "It... tastes like nothing." She made a split second decision to lie. She decided if the nurses thought it was best that he didn't know what the potion did, then there was probably something wrong with her that she wouldn't want him to know.

He looked at her questioningly, and she could tell that he knew she was lying.

"The patient needs rest now," the head nurse said. You can see her in the morning."

"No," Tonks heard herself say. "Can he stay?" She knew he had enough polyjuice to last him and day so it shouldn't be a problem for him to stay the night.

"The nurses gathered together in hushed conversations. They returned and told them it was okay for one person to stay.

"So I guess that's you," Harry said. He was standing behind quietly, while Severus was holding her hand. He was eyeing them closely but she really didn't care at the moment. She felt horrible, and Severus was the only person who was making her feel any better.

"Yes," Severus said. "You can leave now."

"Thanks," Tonks said.

And Harry nodded and walked out the room.

A/N: This is a little bland but it will be important by the next chapter... which will be good. I swear... at least the end.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Okay I was very excited about this chapter so I had to post it even though there might be some errors in it.

Next chapter should be Friday.

CHAPTER: The News

"Can I leave you for a while," he said looking down at her as she wrapped the covers around her body.

"Leave, where are you going?" she asked.

"I have a couple of errands to run; it should take a couple to hours."

A couple of hours seemed like a long time to be locked up in a house under covers. She had not too long been released form St. Mungo's very reluctantly by the healers. Since she was genuinely better it was easy to argue her way out of the hospital and be allowed to return for a checkup. Severus, decided that it would be best if she stayed with him as he didn't trust her to be by herself anymore. She had never really been in his house without him being there so the thought that itself was going to be odd. Not to mention it was the first time she had seen his house in full daylight.

"Okay, leave now and come back quickly," she said.

He nodded and stood up and apparated out of the room.

Tonks stared at the spot where he stood and sighed. It would be very dull without him. She wasn't sleepy because she had slept for many hours before so she just stayed in bed tossing and turning. She noticed the bedroom window was closed and she wondered if he did that to hide her from Wendy. He said he was going to talk to her but she never actually found out if he did.

Had it been anyone else she would have felt guilty about taking Severus from them but she couldn't, Wendy was the one who was trying to convince Severus that she was crazy anyway.

She got up from the bed and made her way to the window. She pulled the blinds aside carefully and slowly and peered outside. Just across from her she could see Wendy looking out her window with a pensive expression on her face that seemed to look even more beautiful than she remembered. She shut the blinds and walked back to the bed and tried to close her eyes.

-o-

She never really fell fully asleep, most of the times she was in and out of it and the slightest bit of noise would wake her up. She was just drifting into sleep again when she heard knocking; a rhythmic thud on the door. She pulled herself out of bed and made her way down stairs. She figured it was probably Harry, who was never bold enough to apparate directly inside his house.

She walked to the door and pulled it open and almost felt her heart drop to the pit of her stomach. This was going to be awkward. "Hello," she said cautiously.

"Is Severus here?" she asked.

"No," she said. And she was beginning to close the door but it was stopped midway before it closed.

"I have something of his that I'd like to give back," Wendy said.

Tonks opened the door again, trying to avoid her eyes. "Okay, I'll give it to him." She said.

Wendy took a bag that was in her hand and handed it to Tonks. It was heavy; it seemed to have a book in it. "I'll give it to him when he comes." She was ready to close the door again but it was stopped. She pulled it back open. "Yes, Wendy,"

"He has one of mine; tell him I'll collect it later when he is home."

She thought about it. Did she really want Severus to see more of Wendy? She didn't even know if he talked to her yet, but perhaps the fact that she was not being friendly indicted that he must have. Then again she had stopped being friendly with her a while ago. "No, you can come and take it now."

She looked at her with narrowed eyes. "No, maybe I should wait."

"Oh no, I insist that you come now," Tonks said. She opened the door further. "We might be busy later." She knew that was a very bitchy thing to say and the look Wendy gave her was worthy of it.

Wendy walked in passed her. Her slender figure was a head taller than her. Tonks closed the door. "What's the name of the book?" Tonks asked.

"It's called Columbus to Castro, we got it when we went to the museum," Wendy said. She didn't seem bitter about it. She began to wonder again if Severus had talked to her. She hated not knowing

"Listen," Tonks started. "I take it that Severus talked to you?"

She put her hand on her hips and looked at her like she was a piece of filth. "I know methods," she said. "Very lady-like."

"Methods," Tonks laughed.

"Yes, it's pity that women these days feel the need to open their legs to have their way."

Her jaw dropped. She wanted slap her into oblivion and she probably would have if someone hadn't just apparated into the room. She looked at the source of the noise. It was Severus.

He looked like he had just walked into a death trap. He eyes moved between the two them. "Okay," he said. She could tell he was trying to decide who he should talk to first. He looked over and her. "Nymphadora, you really shouldn't be up and about, go back to bed."

"Oh, I'm fine," Tonks said.

She could tell this was the last thing that he wanted her to say. He turned his attention to Wendy. "I take it you're here for the book?"

She nodded. "I brought back yours, I finished it this morning."

"You read so quickly," he said. He took out his wand and silently summoned the large book into his hands. He passed it over to Wendy.

"Did you get through the entire thing?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yes, I particularly liked chapter 7."

"Yes, that was rather insightful wasn't it, and very haunting at the same time."

Tonks sat there watching their banter and cleared her throat. She did not want to know about how they enjoyed their never ending books or anything like that, she wanted her gone.

"I should get going," Wendy said. "I have to rest before I head out to work."

"You do that?" Tonks said.

Wendy didn't look at her, she continued to look at Severus. "Have a nice day," she said. She turned around and walked out the front door.

Tonks turned to Severus and placed her hand on her hip. "That was awfully friendly," she said.

He brought his brows together. "Do you really think I will have someone who knows my secret be angry with me?" he asked.

She shrugged. "So are going to continue you entertain her?" Tonks asked.

He walked past her. "What is it that you're worried about Nymphadora, she's harmless?"

She laughed. "She is not; she basically called me a slut before you arrived."

He looked incredulous. "I doubt she would ever use that word."

"She didn't say it but that's what she meant," Tonks argued. She didn't want to believe that Severus was so blinded by the fact that she was beautiful to not see through the prim and proper act. "She basically told me that I had to spread open legs to get you interested in me."

"I can see why she would think that?"

"WHAT?"

He sat down on the couch and stretched out his legs. "She comparing herself to you, I have had sex with you and I have never with her."

She didn't know what he was going to say but she never thought it would be that. "You never had sex with her." She took a seat next to him.

"No," he said plainly. "Wendy is very very very…traditional. She believes in waiting… for what, I'm not sure but waiting all the same."

"So all this time?" Tonks asked.

"No," he said plainly.

She would have preferred if he was sleeping with her. Now that she found out he wasn't she felt like she was some sort of surrogate for his lack of sexual attention from Wendy. Was he with her because she would sex him and Wendy wouldn't.

"What's that look?" he asked her.

She was afraid to tell him what she was thinking in case he confirmed it. She shook her head. "Nothing."

-o-

One of the conditions she was allowed to leave St. Mungo's was that she was expected to return to the following day for a check up. She told Severus that he didn't need to come with her as she was certain it would be fine. She didn't tell him that she was actually anxious to figure out what the pink and purple potion was for more than anything.

"We have good news and bad news," said the healer, the same one that dealt with her from the night before.

Tonks hated bad news she always felt the good one should cushion the blow of the bad one.

"The bad news is that we know what's wrong with you?" the nurse said.

"You mean why you had to give me the pink and purple potion?" Tonks asked.

"No," the nurse said shaking her head. "We know how your blood was drained."

"Oh," she said. She was more comfortable not knowing. "What is it?" she asked.

"Remember we said that we have a list of creatures that extract blood from the body?"

"Yes," she pressed.

"Well the list is quite extensive and it is sorted by region. Certain creatures are more common in certain regions and the particular one that is of trouble to you is not found in Europe at all."

"Then where, I haven't left England in ages."

"It can move around, all though it generally likes to stay in the West Indies."

Tonks eyes opened wide. "The West Indies."

"Yes," the woman said. "It is woman by day and by night she sheds her skin and transforms into a ball of fire. She can extract blood from victim's body, leaving only a small mark"

"Why?" Tonks asked.

"They are usually very old but young in appearance. They feed of the victims' blood to make themselves appear younger."

"How do you tell if someone is one of these things?" Tonks asked the panic clear in her voice.

"Well the only way you can tell if someone is a _Soucouyant_ is to find the shed skin where she hides it when she is transformed or scatter rice at a cross roads and she would be force to gather every grain."

Tonks felt the bridge of her nose between her hands. Her head was spinning, this was too much info her to process. She would have loved it to just be a vampire or something else because at the moment she felt sick to her stomach. There was only one person who she could think of that would be one these things. Wendy.

She turned to the nurse.

"You said there was good news?" She was hoping that it was something that would disprove what she had in her head.

"The potion we gave you will work against any effects the incident might have had on the baby," the nurse said smiling.

"THE BABY?" Tonks asked, thinking she misheard the woman.

"Oh yes dear, you're pregnant."

A/N: Okay so this is not really a cliffhanger because she _is_ pregnant, end of story…

I know someone said they hope the reason for the potion wasn't too dramatic…sorry. She just had to get pregnant. Only one person who reviewed noticed that they didn't use a contraceptive spell or anything… and his fishies are still swimming… he he. I'm evil.

About the _soucouyant_ thing… It will be explained further in the next chapter and we will find out if Wendy is one… oh who am I kidding, of course she is one. I think you guys figured out it was her doing those things to Tonks a while ago. I'm not very good at surprising people. But I promise Wendy has an interesting story.

Anyway…Don't forget to leave a review. I see some people adding the story to their fav list but they have never left a review… come on, be nice…

Whoever it was that told me I was using Well a lot thanks. I didn't even notice that until she pointed it out..


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Reading up on pregnancy is hard; a lot of people in this computer lab must be thinking that I am preggers. Next thing the big rumor on campus will be that I'm having a little one or an abortion I guess. **

CHAPTER: Worrying

The fact that they were careless to the point where they were asking for it never occurred to her until now. She kept playing the night back in her head, trying to remember if in the middle of everything that was going on if either of them did or even suggested a contraceptive spell.

She already knew the answer and it was no. His wand wasn't even in the room when morning came and she didn't' lift hers either. It was impossible to think of anything other than the feel of him inside her. But even so she remembered how he must have used her wand to remove his clothes and she thought about how careless it was of him not to suggest or remember to do the spell.

But it didn't matter whose fault it was. She was the one carrying the child, she was the one who knew about it and it was on her head to tell him that she was pregnant.

-o-

After a long walk trough London, pondering her choices, Tonks decided to go back to Severus' place. She found a dark alley and apparated to the middle of the living room.

When she reached there he was dishing food from a box and placing it on a plate. When ever he decided that he would prepare dinner that was what he did and she was thankful, as he was a terrible cook.

He looked up at her and smirked. She panicked in her head; thinking that he already knew somehow. "I was just thinking that I was going to convince you that I had done this myself," he said.

She tried to smile. "I really don't understand you sometimes. You are brilliant at potions and yet you can't even boil spaghetti."

"You see that's a common misconception that being able to cook will give you an upper hand in potions and vise versa. If that were true, I'd be a Gourmet Chef."

"I can cook and I am good potions," she said matter-of-factly.

He looked at her and sneered. "Well you just have a pair of blessed hands."

She took a seat at the table and he took out two wine glasses from the upper cabinet and set them on the table. He poured some rich, red, liquid into the glass. He placed one in front of her.

The day she was having she could have used a good bottle of wine to help her digest everything that was going.

"So," he said casually, taking a seat next to her "Do I have to fall on my knees and beg you to tell me what the healers said."

Her heart began to race. She couldn't tell him that she was pregnant, that was out of the question and she didn't want to tell him her suspicions about Wendy. He wouldn't believe her anyway, he thought Wendy was a saint.

She pinned her hair behind her ears. "They said I'm fine. I'm back to normal."

He looked at her and took a sip of his wine. "You're lying."

"Huh," she said.

"I can tell when you are lying and I know you did just now there. But I'm not going to press you on it. If you wanted me to know then you would have told me."

She looked at him and her brows knitted together. She wondered how well he could read her and if by some stroke of genius he would be able to deduce that she was pregnant. She picked up the glass and brought the glass to her lips but at soon as the rich, red, fragrant liquid touched her lips she remembered. She put the glass back down. The fact that she didn't drink it wasn't missed by him.

"It's not poisoned you know."

She nodded and she gazed at him, his black eyes staring at her questioningly. Her voice was caught in her throat but she croaked trough it. "I know," she whispered.

"Is something wrong?" he asked, looking at her closely.

She was shaking her head but as she did that contradicting tears were rolling out her eyes.

"And you're not going to tell me," he said like more a statement than question.

She shook her head again. "I'm tired, I'm going to sleep." She pulled her chair back to leave the room but as she did that she remembered. "Can you come up now?" she asked him. She decided that sleeping alone, even for a second was the last thing she wanted to do.

He nodded. "Go on; give me a minute to clear this away."

She nodded and walked out the room and up the stairs and stopped at the top of the flight and sat. She wasn't too keen on going in the room without him, not when his room was in plain view from Wendy's house.

He came up the stairs shortly after and stopped at the top and took her hand. She stood up from the stair. "Why didn't you go in?" he asked.

She could only imagine how bazaar her behavior would have seem to him. "Because I wanted to wait on you," she whispered truthfully.

He took her to bedroom and followed her in. When he reached in, he let go of her hand and went to the window to shut it and close the blinds.

Five minutes later they were having sex.

-o-

Curled up next to him she couldn't help but relinquish herself from all the blame for the pregnancy. Even the second time he didn't remember to do a contraceptive spell. She would have suggested it to him but she didn't know what effect it would have on the child she was carrying and it wasn't like she could get more pregnant anyway.

-o-o-o-

"Okay here it is; I found it." Harry held the book and adjusted his glasses on his face.

"_The old woman lives alone at the end of the village road, seldom seen, her house always closed up as she sleeps away the day. As evening draws near, she stirs and sheds her old and wrinkled skin, which she deposits in a receptacle. Now, as a glowing ball of flame, she rises up through the roof, and with a shrill cry she flies through the night in search of a victim, and she would suck the 'life-blood' from her clean._

_As the blessed day dawns, she makes a beeline through the forest for her home, finds the receptacle with her wretched skin and proceeds to put it on, - but something is wrong, it burns like fire, it seems to shrink and slide away, "Skin, skin, skin, you na know me, you na know me no more.", she croons softly, pleading to the wrinkled thing._

_Then, with horror, she realizes the dreadful thing that has been done: the village boys and men have filled her skin with coarse salt and will soon come and get her, with a drum of boiling tar, the priest and his silver cross, the church bells – and then, the end._

_Note: If you wish to discover who is the Soucouyant in your village, empty 100 lbs of rice at the village crossroads where she will be compelled to pick them up, one grain at a time." _

Harry closed the book and looked at Tonks. "Do you really think that Wendy is one of these things?"

Tonks nodded. "It all fits," she said.

Harry opened back the book to the page and read. "Does Wendy sleep away the day, does she live in the forest?"

Tonks shook her head. "That book is children's book written by muggles. Harry they got it wrong. In St. Mango's they told me everything I needed to know."

Harry let out a heavy sigh. "Okay Tonks, tell me why you think that Wendy is one of these things."

Tonks thought back. "When did I first start getting the marks on my body?"

"Snape said three months ago, so around Christmas." Harry said.

Tonks nodded. "Severus invited Wendy to my place for Christmas. She couldn't do it to me before because she didn't know where I lived."

"It sounds like a co-incidence to me."

"Harry, I have never seen her past dusk."

"She works at night," Harry said like it was obvious.

"She works _every_ night; she has never taken a night off from work, not even Christmas. Severus said she is like a walking history book. The healer said they are usually old and they appear younger than they are… it will explain how the hell she had time to learn six languages fluently. She's as old as the bloody road."

"Tonks, nothing you said is solid evidence yet. I mean it is an outrageous thing to say that someone is sucking your blood on a nightly basis."

"Harry this soucouyant thing is found in the West Indies. Wendy is from Trinidad, that's in the West Indies."

"Okay," Harry said frustrated that he didn't seem to be getting trough to her. "Are you saying that Snape has been shagging a woman old enough to be his mother or grandmother?"

She frowned. "This is not about who he is shagging. This is about the fact that she can cause some serious harm to me and my baby… besides he never slept with her."

"Your what?"

She was hoping that her last comment about Severus never slept with Wendy would distract him from the fact that she let the words slip from her mouth. "Teddy and me," Tonks said quickly.

Harry shook his head and looked at her squinting one eye. "That's not what you said; you said me and my baby… Teddy isn't baby."

She took the book from him and opened it to the page on the soucouyant, trying not to press the issue.

"Tonks," Harry said and she could tell that he already deduced answer. "Does he know that you're… pregnant?"

Tonks closed her eyes and sighed. She supposed she could tell Harry. It would take some of the weight of being the only one who knew off her shoulders. "No," she whispered.

Harry was silent for a long while. He was looking at the ceiling and everywhere except at her. "You have to tell him. I think he'd want to know."

Tonks pinched the bridge of her nose between her fingers. "How am I supposed to tell him, Harry? Severus, hates kids."

"He likes Albus," Harry commented hopefully.

"He liked Albus because he's named after him and he has your mother's eyes, not because he likes kids."

Harry seemed to be searching for an answer. "Listen Tonks, I'm sure he will like a kid of his own, especially if it's a boy, someone he can make into a mini him, even though I'm not sure that's a good idea."

"It's a girl," Tonks heard herself say.

"Is it old enough to tell the sex already?"

"No, it's about a week old but with methamorphs it's different, we're so aware of our bodies we can tell the moment it happens."

"Did you know the moment you got pregnant?"

She sighed. "Well I wasn't aware consciously. But I think subconsciously I knew. I felt like hogging him, claiming him. I guess it was my mind trying to secure a father of the child."

"Well you have to tell him eventually, It will be obvious after a while… unless you plan to…"

She looked at him and face turned into a frown. "I would never…"

"Good, then tell him."

She sighed passed her hand trough her hair. Every time she thought about it she would realize what a big disaster it was. "Harry, do you remember what Severus was like back at school."

Harry nodded. "He was a bloody bastard."

"Does he seem like someone who would want to have kids?"

"Well no… but did he seem like someone you'd be shagging years later?"

She rolled her eyes. She wasn't too uncomfortable that Harry was talking so plain to her because they were not that far away in age.

"Listen," Harry said. "You're here eating your brain alive thinking that he doesn't want kids, for all we know he could have gotten you pregnant on purpose."

Tonks heard herself laugh and it felt like the last time she would laugh in a while. "Don't be silly. We all know that Severus doesn't want kids, the question is, will he allow himself to have any."

"What I'm saying is, even if you know him, it is always a silly thing to assume you know what is going on in his head. He has a way of surprising people. What if you tell him and he's happy about it."

She bit her lips and looked away from him. She knew that Harry was trying to make her feel better but it was good to hear all the same.

**A/N: Have you guys realized that folklore is basically the same everywhere but there are slight changes sometimes. There is apparently a monster version of wiki called monstropedia and it calls it a kind of vampire.**

**I thought about a lot of different things I could make Wendy but I eventually settled on a soucouyant because I know no one would know what it was and it might be interesting to hear about something else.**

**In case no one has noticed, I am from Trinidad, so I know a fair bit about these supernatural things. I'm not superstitious but I found I was getting scared when I was writing this story…silly huh. I think it's because I have a friend who swears she was sucked by one. She is a pretty logical person and does not make up elaborate lies or anything so I was thinking…what if it is true… but it's not. It can't be. It's just something people who live in country sides believe and I live in the city so…**

**DISCLAIMER: That little story thing that was in the chapter was taken from: Newsday's Millennium Special, January 1****st**** 2000, pages 23 and 24.**

**I edited it a bit to fit the purpose of the story and eliminate things that you guys might find confusing. **


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Remember back at chapter eleven when I said that there were only about five chapters to go... Well five chapters later and I am not near completion, so I guess that was BS... The thing is these characters, even though I am writing it, seem to move at thier own speed. **

CHAPTER: Babysitting Again...

By the time the sun came up the following day she able to sense that they were falling into a routine, a routine that involved hardly any talking but lots of kissing, touching and eventually sex. Before they would sit and watch Frasier and talk between commercials but now it seemed like his obsession with the show was just a fad and his new obsession was having sex with her. Not, that she minded it too much, sex was even better now that she was pregnant but she still felt it was an irresponsible pattern to fall into. It was a distraction from the fact that she had to tell him eventually and the fact that despite his sexual attraction they had there wasn't much else going on in their relationship.

She looked to her left to get a glance of him. The covers were brought up to his waist and his eyes were closed but she knew he was awake. It seemed impossible for him to stay asleep after the sun came up. She took one of her hands that was between her head and pillow and placed it around his waist. He opened one eye and looked down at her.

"Did I wake you?" she asked knowing the answer.

"No," he said and he took her hand and enclosed it in his.

She sighed.

"Is something bothering you?" he asked.

What a question. There were several things bothering her. The fact that she was having his baby was naturally bothering her and then there was the whole situation with Wendy. "No, not really," she lied. "I was just wondering how come you don't watch Frasier anymore?"

He took a while to answer, maybe because he was ashamed of the reason. "Because I missed the episode when Niles tells Daphne he's in love with her," he whispered.

"Oh," she replied. She didn't expect the reason to be that simple. "When was it?"

His thumb was massaging the back of her hand. "It was same day when you decided to blurt out that you wanted to get into my pants I think."

She could tell that he meant it as a joke but she wasn't in the mood to joke. "Do you regret that you missed it?"

He made a noise like the suggestion was silly. "No."

She wondered if he would say the same thing when he learnt that it was from that night she got pregnant. He might find himself a time turner and warn himself to stay his butt in his house. "I'm babysitting today," she whispered.

"Today is Wednesday, are they making it a habit now?" he sounded annoyed, even more evidence of how much he hated kids; he was already growing tired to Albus.

"It's just a small favor," she said. Of course she didn't tell him that it was Harry doing her a favor. She decided she would test the waters on his reaction to the idea of having kids with Albus.

He sighed. "Is he coming here or to your place?"

"Mine," she replied and took her hand from him and pulled herself out of bed. "I should get going."

"I'll come with you; I don't have anything to do today. I might as well help you watch the brat."

She nodded, and took up a bathrobe that was thrown aside on a chair in the room and wrapped it around her naked body. She would never apparate naked.

-o-o-

Harry placed Albus in the crib down gently and looked Tonks. He raised an eyebrow as if asking her the question.

"Not yet," she said.

Harry made a face and then looked from Albus to Tonks. "Just bring it up casually."

"How," she whispered. "Should I say, Isn't Albus a precious baby, I think ours will be even better though, by the way I'm pregnant."

Harry shrugged. "What's wrong with that?"

"I can't just tell him like that, it's not like we planned to have a kid or anything."

"Well they way I see it he must know there is a possibility that you would be," Harry said. "He is very calculating person and he must have thought that not doing a contraceptive spell could get you pregnant."

She shrugged. "Maybe he doesn't know, maybe he's catholic, he does seem to have an aversion to them."

"Are you still having sex with," Harry complained.

She shrugged. "I'm already pregnant, it's not like I could get more… or have twins, then triplets and quadruplets or anything. Besides, he wants to have sex with me all…"

Where the conversation was going seemed to have deeply disturbed Harry. He waved his hand in front of her indicating that she should stop talking. "That is so much more information than I need."

"You're the one who brought it up you know."

He frowned. "Just try not to get too distracted by him and keep an eye on Albus, okay."

"I know. It's not like I automatically strip every time I see him."

"Again Tonks, that's too much information."

He took one last look at Albus who was sleeping quietly and walked out the room with Tonks in tow.

Severus was in the kitchen and she knew he would be there until Harry left. He was still avoiding him after Harry called him out for cheating on Wendy. She was certain it would assuage his guilt to tell him what she suspected Wendy of doing but she couldn't decide if that news would get rid of the bad taste he would have in his mouth from finding out _what_ he was dating.

She walked passed the living room and out the front door and disappeared from her view. As he was gone Severus came out the kitchen carrying a cup of tea.

-o-o-

She had just given the baby a warm bath and was putting the diapers on, which Ginny preferred to use and Severus sat on the chair watching her. She had laid out a change of clothes for the baby, a little pajama that Harry brought along with his things. She watched as Severus hands absentmindedly reached for the soft fabric of the baby blue pajama.

"Would you like to put it on?" she asked quietly, sensing that perhaps he wanted to try.

"No," he said quickly. "I don't know how, perhaps I'll hurt him."

"I can show you," she said. "It's easy."

He looked reluctant at first but he got up from where he was sitting, bringing the clothes with him and handed it to her. She took the garment and placed the closed toe pajama over the baby's little feet. "You see it's easy, you can do the hands." He frowned a little but reached out to take the rest of the pajama that wasn't on yet. He took the baby's tiny cuffed hand and placed it in one of the holes, all the while his hands were shaking slightly. She heard a light sigh of relief escape his lips when he got one hand down. He took the other hand that was putting up a bit of a fight and tried to get it in the whole but Albus resisted in giggling delight. He let go of the hand and retreated a bit. "It's okay, they do that sometimes, you're not hurting him," she said and touched his shoulder, urging him to go on. He took the resistant hand between two fingers and tried again, this time succeeding to get it in the little whole provided. He seemed relieved when it was over. "That wasn't so bad was it?"

" It seems easy when you have experience," he said, looking at his handy work. Albus giggled, unaware that he had caused Severus so much distress.

She lifted the baby up to a standing position and instructed Severus to button the back of the garment which he managed to do with ease.

"Now, it's time for his bottle," she said. "Would you bring it, it's just there," she instructed and pointed at the top of the chest of drawers in the room. He fetched the bottle of milk from the counter and handed it to her. She was still holding the baby so she didn't take it right away. "Would you test it please," she told him.

"Test it?" he asked.

She nodded. "Splash some against your skin and see if it's the right temperature. It shouldn't be too hot just nice and warm."

She looked at him as he sprinkled some of the liquid in the bottle on his skin. He seemed to think the temperature was fine so he handed it to her. She took the bottle in her other hand and took seat on the chair that she liked to sit on. Albus was reaching for the bottle with excited eyes. She brought the bottle to the child's mouth and he drank slowly, sending air bubbles up the bottle that popped on top. Severus leaned against the crib and looked at her as she did this. Her eyes met his and she couldn't help but think for a fleeting moment that he looked sad.

"Severus," she said quietly. "Do you think that you could ever want to have a kid?"

He took a while to answer, it seemed like eternity to her. "No, children don't like me; I'd make a horrible father."

She bit her bottom lip. "Do you believe that?"

He nodded. "I know, sometimes things are innate. My father was not much of one, I think… I know I would inherit that from him."

She looked at him straight in the eye so what she said would sink in. "I think you're wrong, I think you would make an excellent father, look how Albus takes to you, he really likes you."

He frowned. "That's because he is too young to know any better."

An awkward silence passed between them, during which Albus had already fallen asleep with his milk three quarter finished. She sat up slowly and walked about patting the baby on the back, waiting for a burp, when she heard it she walked over to the crib and placed the baby down gently on the pillow. He moved a little, with some jerks against the cool breeze coming trough the window and then fell right asleep again. For a moment the only noise in the room was the gentle meeting of the wind chimes above the crib.

She looked over to Severus cautiously. "Do you think that you don't deserve to have all this?"

"Sometimes people have a way of knowing what is for them and for others, this is something I don't think is for me?" he said, starring at the sleeping baby.

"Well maybe it is for you," Tonks replied in a mumble.

His head turned to her in quick jerk. "Are you saying that because you're pregnant?" he asked in a not too gentle voice, it sounded like an accusation.

Somehow all the courage she was building up seeped right out of her. "No," she replied knowing it was the truth, she would have told him that even if she wasn't pregnant. And he sighed in relief and nodded, and she knew that the idea of her being pregnant was a disaster in his mind.

-o-o-

By the end of the day, she was back in his arms, tired, resting on a pillow, looking at him, he doing the same. They laid there in the dark staring at each other, fingers intertwined between the sheets. It was at moments like this when she liked him best; he would be most open and would probably reveal anything to her.

"Do you like having sex with me better than you like talking with me?" she asked out of the blue.

"What do you mean?" he asked and he seemed genuinely confused by the question.

She shrugged. "I guess I should be able to tell you what's on my mind," she said. He squeezed her hand in his encouraging her to go on. "I guess I feel like what we had before has just been replaced by sex."

He sighed. "I'm not a sexually voracious person. I don't need to have it often, I don't want to… But I do need to feel close to someone who understands me; I haven't had that in a long time. And I feel when I am having sex with you; I am closet to you as possible."

She sighed. "I feel close to you too, I feel like I can tell you anything?" she said.

"And yet you don't," he replied.

She looked away from him because she knew it was the truth, there was so much that she wasn't telling him. "Because," she whispered. "I want to protect you from the truth for as long as possible."

There was a significant pause from him and she could tell that he was trying to make up his mind. "When do you think you will tell me?" he asked.

She admired that he trusted her judgment. "When I think you're ready to hear it."

**A/N: Like I said. These characters move at thier own speed and she just wasn't ready to tell him.I know it seems like I am stalling but I'm not. I planed to tell him in this chapter but in the moment it just didn't feel right, after what he said. So we'll see when that would happen.**

**I really hope you guys liked this one. It will really tie in well with the next chapter.**

**So pretty please be nice and leave some reviews. I was watching my stats for this story ( I had no idea you could do that by the way) and it seems there are a lot more Snape and Tonks fans than I thought, which is good...**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews… I see what you guys are saying, she is making it worse and in my mind the more she waits the angrier he would get with her when he finds out. He might thing she was planning on terminating it or something and that's why she didn't tell him… hmm, I don't know.**

**I'd like to apologize for this long chapter in advance. But there is at least one good thing to take away from it. **

CHAPTER: Rice.

He sat opposite her, leaning against the arm of the chair. She could see his eyes scanning the pages of the book, Severus Snape: Saint or Scoundrel. He looked a mixture of amused and insulted by what he was reading. She sat on the other end of the chair, wrapped under covers, listening to his commentary on the glaring inaccuracies of the publication and according to him there were many. He turned a page that he must have thought was rather dull and moved on to another. His eyes lit up in excitement. "Dating," he said with a sneer, "this should be fascinatingly comical." She grinned at him because she read that chapter already and knew it was filled with a bunch of things that seemed highly unlikely. It basically said that even if he loved Lily Evans his whole life, he spent his days testing the waters. It said that he was a notorious womanizer and there were hundreds of women who could contest to the fact.

"Apparently, I have fathered eleven bastard children. Two of which belong to this… ah… woman." He showed her the picture of the woman and her son, who surprisingly looked like him, mainly because of the hooked nose. "And how convenient, she believes she is entitled to half my estate." He flipped the page in annoyance. "I can assure you that if do get someone pregnant it would at least be someone I've actually met in my lifetime."

She pressed her lips together and stared at him. The idea of him having children really seemed to annoy him. "Did you read the fine print at the bottom of the page?" she asked him. He turned back to it and brought the book close up to his eyes. "Oh, here it is… _After extensive research the testimony of the above mention parties were deemed to be fraudulent_. And it written so large too, I'm certain no one missed it."

She would have missed it if she wasn't plodding trough the book trying to find something to disprove what it said. The idea of him having more children with another woman was scary.

He continued to read through the book, every once in a while reading something to her that he thought she might find humorous. She looked at him as he went through the book, looking largely unimpressed by anything that was written. At one point he started reading and for the first time he got a serious look on his face. He pressed his lips together and his brows became married. He closed the book and rested it on the coffee table. She knew that whatever it was he just read was both the truth and painful. "What is it?" she asked

He shook his head and absentmindedly looked at his nails like they were suddenly interesting. She picked up the book from the table and flipped trough the book, trying to determine where he stopped. Based on what he last read to her she could tell he was at the chapter about his family. She glanced at him, asking him permission with her eyes to enquire further into what had upset him. He didn't give her any indication that he minded, instead he looked away from her, trying to find something interesting about rug. She turned her eyes to the book. She read until she came up upon the quote; one of his neighbors, who vaguely remembered him said; "_I don't think anyone ever cared for that child. There was this time when he broke his arm I think…Well I never thought it was an accident._" She closed the book and placed it back on the table.

"Sev," she whispered. "Is that true?" she asked. He didn't answer her right away; he didn't even look at her. Instead he continued to stare at the ground. She poked him in with her finger gently, trying to provoke a response.

"I'm not sure which part you're referring to," he said casually.

"Severus," she said seriously.

His posture changed, she could tell that he was very uncomfortable talking about this. He was pulling on the lobes of his ear. "Yes," he said, though it was a wrist." And he looked down at his hands, examining them. "I can't even remember which one it was, it's funny how wounds heal like that."

"Who did that to you?" she asked, trying not to seem phased.

He looked at her. "My father, though it was not entirely on purpose… see he intended to hit my mother."

"Did he do that often?" she whispered.

"Umm… only when he was drunk. Other than that, they just argued all the time."

She moved closer from leaning against the back the couch and went over to his side. She laid down in his lap and took hold of his nervous, twitching hands. He was more open when he was touching her, when he felt physically close to her. She looked up at him. "Tell me bout them," she said.

"What do you want to know?" he asked. He took his free hands and began to run them through her hair, brushing strands away from her face.

"Why did they get married, they don't seem like they were very compatible."

He sighed. "They got married because of me…"

"Because of you?" she asked.

"Yes, I was a mistake. You have to understand that in those days it was not acceptable for a woman to have a child without the father… so she told him and he made the decision."

"So he married her _because_ she was pregnant with you?"

He nodded. "He never forgave her for it though; He felt that she did it on purpose, to tie him down. He was young, so was she… I'm more inclined to think that they had no idea what they were doing."

"Did they tell you this?" she asked.

"My mother did…once, she said she wish she never had me… though she was rather inebriated when she said it."

Her voice seized in her throat. She couldn't imagine a parent, especially a mother ever saying that to her child, it was unthinkable, it was a crime. She was finally getting to understand why Severus didn't want to have kids. If she had parents like that then she would be afraid of parenting too. "Do you hate them?" she asked in a croak.

"I don't hate her… I never did. My father was just always so… rough. There would be times when he would be out at work and I would actually be praying that he would not come home, that he would just stay away… or just die… really."

"I wish he would die and I don't even know the bastard."

"Oh he did die," he said casually. "One of the best days of my life."

"How," she asked.

"His liver, it finally gave way."

-o-

"Which one do we use, there's long grain, short grain, white, parboiled, basmati…" Harry's eyes scanned the packages on the grocery shelf, frustrated with the large variety. His hands reached up to shelf and picked up the basmati.

"Hey, that's the most expensive," Tonks complained.

Harry glanced at her annoyed. "Tonks, aren't your priorities a little out of order. If you really believe she is this thing do you think that it's not worth it to prevent her from sucking you dry again?"

"I have a baby on the way; I can't be spending a bunch of money on rice."

"Well Snape is no pauper; I think he never spent a dime of his paycheck until he died. Trust me, when you decide to tell him, the child would be well provided for."

Harry was always urging her to tell Severus like it was something so easy, he didn't know half the things about Snape that she knew.

"Just take the white rice, it's the cheapest."

Harry frowned. "You are making a much bigger deal of this than it needs to be. I don't see how he could be mad… it's a kid. Remember he was actually decent to kids in Slytherin. If it's his own…" He took three packages of the rice and loaded it in the pushcart.

-o-

"So how are we going to get her at a crossroads?" Harry asked.

"We wait until she leaves the house, she always leaves eventually. She doesn't have a car so she walks to the bus stop."

"So we're just going to sit around until she decides to leave her house?" Harry asked.

"Yeah," she replied like it was obvious. "It's called a stakeout, were you absent the day they thought it in Auror training?"

He frowned. "No, it's just that if Snape comes, he's bound to ask questions about what we are doing right, and you don't want him to know about this either."

"Well he won't believe me," she complained.

"Well if he's sleeping with you he could at least believe you, it's only manners."

She rolled her eyes. "Harry, just throw on the cloak and sit still."

-o-

An hour of them sitting and staring out the window, waiting for Wendy to leave they were unsuccessful. It was just beginning to get boring, when she heard the sound of Severus apparating in the kitchen. "He's here, put the cloak on," she said to Harry.

Like a pro, Harry quickly flung the cloak on, covering his entire body and disappearing against the window.

Just the he walked out the kitchen and into the living room. He saw her sitting by the bench by the window. "So you're here, I thought you said you were going to the supermarket." he asked.

"I did," she said matter-of-factly.

"Did you get the tea?" he asked her.

She frowned. "Oh I totally forgot about that. I just picked up some things for my place…" she said casually, still looking out the window. "I thought you said you were going to the bank?" she asked. "Did you get what you were going for?"

He nodded. "Someone actually wants to by my house," he said, amused. He walked over to her and took a seat that Harry had thankfully vacated.

"Your house, this house?"

"No, the other one, the one in Spinner's End."

"Do you want to sell it then?" she asked.

"I would have given it away if I thought someone would actually want it. It's a mess. Potter tried getting rid of it before but no one was biting so he just transferred it under by new name. I never expected that someone would actually want it."

"Well one's man's trash is another man's treasure."

She sneered at her. She could tell that something was on his mind, something that he wasn't saying. "So I guess I'll have to get that tea myself then?" he said.

"Oh Sorry," she laughed.

He stared at her for a moment. He had a serious expression on his face. He looked away from her and out the window. "I was thinking it would be less stressful if I just buy what you need and kept it here?"

She bit her lip. "Then I'll have to be here all the time."

He looked at her again. "You already are here all the time. It only makes sense to move some of things here, for convenience."

She smiled at him lightly. "I guess it does make sense."

"So is there anything you want at the supermarket then?" he asked and his tone and posture had changed, he seemed more confident.

"Ice- cream please, chocolate or pistachio." She said.

He leaned in and kissed her on her cheek before he stood up. She knew that if he knew Harry was there he would never do that in front of him. "I'll be back in a while," he said, then disappeared in a POP.

Harry pulled off his cloak with a grin on his face. "That was sooo bizarre. I never thought I would see Severus Snape love sick again, I thought it was once in a blue moon thing but…."

"He is not love sick," Tonks argued.

"Tonks, he just asked you to move in with him."

Her eyes went wide. "Ah… did you hear the same conversation I did?"

"What do you think he meant by you should move some of your things to his place." Harry seemed to be surprised that she was so daft.

"He means for convenience," she said. Harry was once again giving their relationship more credit than it deserved.

"Apparating is not that hard Tonks, it's nothing to do with convenience. This is good… if he wants you to move in with him then he must know that you come with a kid and if he's willing to accept Teddy, then…"

"Harry you are getting a little excited here, he never said anything about me moving in with him. He said I should move some of my things."

"Well he's not going to come out and say it. You know how he is."

"Yes I do, better than you and if that's what he wanted then he would have told me. He has no trouble telling me anything any more. I think you are under the impression that we are in love Harry, we're not."

"You're not?" Harry asked. He seemed disappointed.

"Well, no. I am not in love him and he is not in love with me. We both know that what we want we can't have; Lily is dead, Remus is dead. In many aspects we are both very alone. It makes sense to have company in your loneliness."

Harry frowned. "No offence Tonks but I think you two are being stupid. My mother has been dead for _twenty seven_ years; Remus has been dead for ten. Do you actually think it is logical to ignore the fact that you are both alive and you two like each other enough to want to spend every bloody day together?" he breathed angrily. "Do you think it makes sense to dismiss the idea that you both could fall in love if you will only allow yourself."

Harry had a way of offending people even when he didn't intend to. "Well Harry I believe that everyone has one person they are meant to be with. For me that person is Remus and for him that person Lily."

"But they are dead. How can you be meant to be with someone who is dead? What sort of relationship is that?"

She looked at him and folded her arms. Perhaps it was because Harry never lost someone he loved like she loved Remus but she knew that Harry would never understand what she was saying. Just because Remus was dead, didn't mean she stopped loving him. In many ways she was still his wife. What sort of person would she be if she forgot about him and just moved on to Severus.

Harry looked away from her sensing that the battle was lost and looked out the window. His eyes widen in excitement. "Oh here she comes." He took the cloak and handed it to Tonks. "Now put the cloak on. I'll go talk to her, you linger behind and when we reach the crossroads, you scatter the rice."

"Right, "she said. She threw the cloak over her head and followed Harry out the door; bringing her wand in her pocket.

Harry jogged a little to catch up with Wendy and Tonks stayed close behind, hidden under the cloak.

"Hey Wendy," Harry said catching up to her.

She smiled at him pleasantly. "Hello Harry, nice to see you again."

Harry looked over to where he suspected Tonks would be and then looked back at Wendy. "So I was just at Severus' place, he wasn't there though. So you have any idea when he would be back?"

She stopped walking a few feet away from the intersection at the end of the block and turned to Harry. "Well I wouldn't know, would I?"

"I guess not," Harry said flatly giving her an expression that said he was sympathetic.

She turned around and began to walk again, heading closer to the intersection. Tonks gave a little sprint to catch up with them.

When she was satisfied that she had reached the intersection of the street running perpendicular to street were Severus lived she said the incantation that brought the thousands of grains of rice to her. She let them fall to the ground; some scattering on the pavement, some scattering on the narrow asphalt road.

Wendy stopped in her tracks, looking down at the grains and her face contorted in confusion.

Harry looked at her expectantly. "Is something the matter he said?"

She shook her head slowly, and even as she did this she could see that she was taking a mental note of the amount of grains there were and already, tears were forming in her eyes. "I forgot something, where did you say you were going?" she asked, not taking her eyes off the grains.

"I'm just heading home actually," he said cautiously.

"Well don't let me keep you, I'll see you around." She said.

Harry stood there for a moment looking at her but eventually decided to walk off. He crossed the road and disappeared between two houses, where he must have disapparated.

When Wendy was satisfied he was out of view, she knelt on her knees and pulled up the sleeve of her silk bodice. Then without looking around she picked up a single grain of rice and said. "One." Then in similar fashion she picked up another and placed it in her other hand and said "Two," and she continued like this.

Tonks wasn't sure how long she stood there watching but the amount of rice Wendy had gathered had become too much to fit in the palm of her hands. One gain fall out of her tight grasp and she emptied them all and began to count again from the start. Tears were running down her face freely as she gathered them, her delicate fingers were trembling and as she tried to pick the grains from the whole and ridges in the concrete pavement. People driving by slowly in cars looked at her with curious glances and drove away, not daring to say anything to the woman who they thought must have been crazy.

At the first sight of blood drawing from her fingertips Tonks waved her wand and let all the grains she summoned earlier vanish.

Wendy looked at the ground in confusion.

Tonks, seeing enough, turned and walked back in the direction of Severus' house. She opened the door and Harry was in the hall waiting for her.

He raised his hands defeat. "So you were right. How do we get rid of her now?"

**A/N: Okay so next chapter should be up on Friday, as usual. **

**I had an idea how she could tell him then I did some research and I found out it would have been inaccurate, so I had to squash the idea, pity, it was a good one I think. **

**Hey, would you guys mind if I had a slight inaccuracy for the sake of the story. Answer quickly, I start writing it today.**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Since everyone was okay with me having the inaccuracy you guys got what you wanted early. Woo Hoo!!! If you said no I would have had to wait a while to write it. So here it is.**

_**Amy**_** is back on the net- Yah, I'm glad you found time to read the story ( I know how it gets sometimes) and that you were surprised about Wendy, I got a lot of reviews with people telling me that they thought she was a vampire and what not… so I'm happy someone was surprised. **

**And **_**ProperT**_** started to feel bad for Wendy… in the words of Mr. Burns… "Excellent"**

CHAPTER: Stressing.

Tonks, seeing enough, turned and walked back in the direction of Severus' house. She opened the door and Harry was in the hall waiting for her.

He raised his hands defeat. "So you were right. How do we get rid of her now?"

Tonks looked at Harry, her eyes narrowed. "What?" she asked in confusion. Her head was spinning. She felt a cold draft collapsing on her. She was feeling a bit dizzy.

"Well, now that we know it is her doing it, how do we stop her, how do we destroy it?"

"Destroy… I don't want to _kill_ her. I'm not too sure she's an _it _either."

"She's a blood sucking fiend, I'm pretty sure that's an _it_."

Tonks shook her head, working all those years as an Auror must have hardened his heart too much. She looked at him and closed her eyes slowly.

"You okay Tonks,"

She nodded, "I just need to sit," she said. She walked over to the living room and took a seat on the couch and closed her eyes again, the natural light that was coming in the room suddenly seemed too bright for eyes. They were giving her a piercing headache. She put her hand over her eyes in an effort to prevent any light from coming in.

She felt Harry put his hand on her shoulder. "You look clammy, are you sure you're okay."

She nodded. "I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do about all this."

"Listen Tonks, you're stressing your self out. Tell Snape and he would take care of it for you."

"That's what you think isn't it; all the answers to my problems lies with me telling Severus."

"Well yes," Harry said loudly.

"Can you stop shouting; I have a horrible head ache."

"I'm not shouting," he complained, but even as he said it he sounded like he was shouting at her.

She rested her head on the pillow and curled herself up in a ball. She was still feeling extremely cold. She wanted a blanket.

"Tonks you look really ill," Harry said, but now his voice seemed far away. She found herself drifting and drifting, until she could no longer hear the sound of his voice or see the sharpness of the light.

-o-

She heard the sound of someone closing the door in the room though it sounded distant. She opened her eyes slowly, anticipating harsh lights but the room was in darkness. She could tell she had been moved from downstairs to Severus' bedroom. She wasn't sure what time of day it was but clearly a considerable amount of time had passed.

Her eyes were adjusting to the darkness slowly and she was beginning to see little shapes in the room emerging. She could now see that Severus was in the room and he was coming in the bed with her. "Sev," she said.

"Oh you're awake. How are you feeling?"

She didn't consciously know how she was feeling until he asked. She still had a slight headache and now she felt more hot than cold, she told him so.

"You have a fever. I brewed a potion for you but it's only effective when the person is awake." He got out of the bed and took something from the desk on his side and went over to her side and knelt down. She sat up slightly. "Take it; it will help you feel better."

She shook her head but she knew he probably wouldn't be able to see that she was doing that. "I don't want it," she said softly. She didn't know what potion it was nor the effect it would have on the baby, she wasn't about to take it.

"Hmm… Harry told me that I shouldn't make you take it, he even predicted that you would refuse it."

He was clearly waiting for an explanation. "I don't like taking potions," she said hoping that would be enough.

"You don't like taking potions, it's a perfectly harmless potion, and I can brew it in my sleep. I assure you its fine."

"I'm sure it is but I still don't want it." She slummed back down on the pillow and turned away from him hoping that would be all for the night. He sighed and she heard him moving around the room. He was in the bed next to her again. He didn't press her further on it, instead he felt out for her hand and took it in his and stayed silent the rest of the night.

-o-

She wasn't sure who feel asleep first, him or her but she knew she was the first to awake.

It wasn't the rising sun, coming trough the window that woke her up like always. Instead it was a sharp pain in her stomach. She was dreaming that she was being stabbed repeatedly in the stomach by Wendy when she opened her eyes in a start. She sat up and found that the sharp pains were in fact real. It was more of a pulling and a stiffness that came in spasms one after the other, the pain would ease for a moment then it would return even more severe than the last blow. One hand instinctively grabbed her stomach in an effort to ease the pain; the other was still in Severus'. She pulled it away form him roughly and held on to her stomach. The pain was now becoming unbearable. She let out a shriek of pain that was accompanied with tears following down her face.

By then Severus was awake, asking her if she okay. She hated the question because it was obvious she wasn't. She got out of the bed, almost tumbling and made her way to the bathroom with her back hunched over form pain. She turned on the light and looked down at her cotton trousers.

Blood.

-o-

"You are very luck Miss Tonks, the potion we gave you was still protecting the baby, you are very lucky indeed," The nurse looked at her with some disapproving glares. "What were doing, I told you to get bed rest?" Tonks couldn't speak; instead tears were just flowing down her cheeks. The nurse turned her attention to Severus. "You're the father?" she asked cautiously.

Tonks looked over to Severus, who was seated by her bedside with his hand enclosed around hers. His face was unmasked, he came as himself. She was able to see his reaction to the situation on his own features. It was impossible to tell what he thought about it but she could tell that he was surprised. "Ah…yes," he said.

The healer looked at him and shook his head. "What was she doing today, before she started to feel ill."

He looked at Tonks and then back to the nurse. "She went to the supermarket," he said simply.

"Don't have her on her feet too much. She is going to have a very difficult pregnancy considering what happened so early on. You're putting too much stress on her."

She hated that the healer was scolding Severus for something that totally wasn't his fault and she hated that he was taking it. She wanted to shout something in his defense but all she could do was sob over hiccoughs.

The healer frowned; looking satisfied that she had made them feel bad enough. "We'll keep her here for another day to repair some of the damage that was done to the wall, do you intend to stay with her?" she asked Severus.

He looked at her and nodded.

She went to the cupboard and took out a glass bottle, with a potion that looked as clear as water but when she poured it out in the tiny goblet it changed a pinkish, orangey color. She handed it to Tonks and she took in her hands and swallowed. It tasted horrible but she didn't complain.

The nurse took the goblet back form her and wrote something on her chart. "I'll back with another dose in three hours," she said. She walked out the room with her chart hanging at her side.

Tonks looked over to Severus, he was staring at her stomach under the sheet like it was going to explode. He kept her hand in his as he gently robbed the back with his thumb. "Say something please," she urged him. But he didn't say anything. He just continued to look at her stomach. "Severus…" she began but he cut her off.

He made a shhing noise and brought his index finger of his free hand to his lips. "Don't encourage me to talk."

"Why, tell me something, tell me what you think."

He looked away from her stomach and caught her eyes. "Tonks, I am _so_ furious right now that I know if I _do_ tell you something it would not be pleasant. So for your own sake, don't ask me to talk to you again."

She turned away from him; the look he was giving her was almost scary. She had never seen him this angry. He had never called her Tonks before.

**A/N: The inaccuracy was that someone can't miscarry from stress. I was shocked to learn that, I always thought you could. The yahoo health article said that there is no proof that stress could cause someone to miscarry. I didn't want to write it and then have people correcting me saying that my logic is off so I asked permission and I'm glad I did.**

_**Sameera**_** wanted an excellent chapter, well I tried but it's definitely not excellent.**

**I decided that I won't have him say anything because I remember that anytime my aunt was really angry with me she wouldn't speak. When she was VERY angry she would sing and Snape would never sing so… he just didn't say anything about it.**

**You will notice I made it that she never told him but he found out… he he. That's worse I think.**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/n: Hello guys, it's so nice to see that I got some new reviewers to the story. I'm having a lot of fun writing it.**

**But a warning: You might hate Snape by the end of this chapter. But don't worry you'll love him again by the end of the next one.**

CHAPTER: Depression

To say that she was right not wanting to tell him was an understatement. From the moment he found out that she was pregnant a massive void grew between them. The last day she spent in the hospital was an indication of how things were going to be between them. He lingered around in the back, hardly saying a word, avoiding the eyes of the healers. This she guessed had more to do with the fact that his face was still very much his own but she couldn't think of a good reason why he avoided looking at her, touching her or even saying more than just two words to her at a time. It was like suddenly she had become something dirty.

At the very least she could say that he didn't completely abandon her. When she was released he took her to his place and made sure she was comfortable and had everything she needed but that was where it stopped. He didn't even sleep on the same bed as her anymore. When the night came she was lay there, still, staring out the window, scared out of her mind that Wendy would come and suck her dry and he would be somewhere else in the house doing lord knows what. The first night she spent alone she cried for hours before she fell asleep. She just felt like everything had been placed on her shoulders and she was more alone than ever.

It would be lie to say that he was acting like he didn't care about her. She knew that he still cared. When she was in and out of sleep he would come in to check on her; one night she counted that he did this no less than seven times. Then, when the morning came he would wait on her hand and foot and anything she asked him for he would get it for her but again that was where he drew the line. He wouldn't talk to about the baby or what it meant for their relationship, it just seemed like he was avoiding the topic all together, it was becoming frustrating. That combined with fact that her body felt like it had been made a plaything for a hippogriff left her feeling severely depressed.

-o-

On moorings when he showed he would come into the room and to get dressed, this was one of the better moments of the day. She loved that he was comfortable enough around her to act like she wasn't there and all she had to do was lay back and watch him put on his clothes in the particular order which he liked that almost made it seem like a ritual.

She laid in bed, watching as he rolled up the sleeves to his shirt one morning, his arms looking strong yet gentle, like his touch. She hated that fact that even with every thing that went on between them she still wanted him. It wouldn't have been so horrible if the feelings were reciprocated but she was certain that he would never want to touch her again.

She had been working up the courage to talk to him but the words were always getting caught in her throat. But now, with his morning ritual almost complete it seemed as good a time as any.

"Severus," she said quietly.

"Yes," he replied and he wasn't looking at her.

"Can we talk?" she asked. She held her breath because she knew how he felt about talking.

His back was to her but she didn't need to see his face to tell what the expression would be. He was angry. He took a couple of moments before he shook his head. "I'm not ready to talk to you yet," he said quietly.

She was not surprised; she was half expecting an answer like this. "When do you think you would be ready? She asked cautiously.

The answer came back quickly and his tone sounded harsh. "When I could stand to look at you or when the sound of your voice doesn't sound like nails on chalk board, which ever one comes first."

What ever she thought she thought he was going to say it was no way cruel as that. She laid silent, making a vow to herself that she was not going to try to talk to him again.

-o-

"I can't stay here," Tonks said looking at Harry.

"What do you mean, you can't stay here?" Harry asked.

She sighed and shifted on the bed. "Harry he's acting like…what he said to me…"

"What did he say?" Harry asked, and she could tell that he was feeling sorry for her. She hated people to feel sorry for her because that usually led to her feeling sorry for herself, which would get her nowhere.

Tonks shook her head fighting back the tears. "I can't apparate on my own, I don't have the strength. Do you think you can help me?"

Harry looked hesitant. "So you just want to leave without telling him?"

"Well what difference does it make if I do tell him? I'm miserable here Harry, at least if I'm at my house I won't have to see him everyday."

"And who's going to take care of you?"

She didn't put much thought into that but it was a problem easily solved. "I'll hire someone." He still looked reluctant. "Listen Harry, I tried talking to him and he doesn't want to talk. This is not like with Remus, I'm not married to him, he owes me nothing and I don't owe him anything either."

"But I don't want to get in the middle of this," Harry said.

"You're not in the middle. I could take the knightbus to get home, it's just that its' a little bumpy, and I'm feeling sort of nauseous."

"Okay Tonks, give it one more day and if nothing has changed I'll come and take you home, okay."

"One more day," she repeated.

"Yes, just one. You can wait that long."

"I suppose."

-o-

He brought her dinner and rested on the table at the side of the bed. He was ready to leave the room without saying anything to her but she stopped him.

"Severus," she called and he stopped at the door, he didn't turn around.

"After this morning I was prepared never to talk to you again and perhaps I am wasting my time now but I think it is best we talk."

"I told you I'm not ready to talk to you yet."

"I can't wait until you're ready, I have given you almost two weeks and I feel like it's getting us no where, so it's either we talk right now or we don't talk at all."

He turned to look at her and her. His face was sporting a frown she hadn't seen on his features in years. "So are you going to give me a time frame as to when I should stop being mad at you."

She guessed he was trying to intimidate her but she was too tired to put up with him just then. "No, you can be angry with me all you want but just know what I am as serious as a heart attack when I say we talk now or we don't talk at all."

He looked taken aback that she was talk to him this way, but it was the least he should expect considering what he told her earlier. There was no way he could expect her to talk that lying down. "Very well then, what do you want to say that's so important?"

She shook her head. "I don't have anything to say, this is about what you have to say. I already know how I feel about this but you… is the idea of me being pregnant that disgusting to you?" she asked, surprising herself with her honesty.

**A/N: I know this does not look good. I'm sorry, I told you guys he would angry right and he is… it's like he is old Snape here.**

**Anyway: I'm back on campus and now I have classes that will be interrupting my writing. I hope I'd be able to keep up with the updates… Next chapter should be up on Wednesday.**

**So don't forget to leave a review. Tell me if you think he is being a nasty little piece of excrement.**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/n: Oh you guys were so nice. Thanks for wishing me well in my studies… **

CHAPTER: Misconceptions I

She shook her head. "I don't have anything to say, this is about what you have to say. I already know how I feel about this but you… is the idea of me being pregnant that disgusting to you?" she asked, surprising herself with her honesty.

"To me?" he breathed and he edged closer to her. "How can you say that?"

"How can I not?" she replied a little louder than she intended. She could tell from the look on his face that he didn't like the tone she was using. She tried to calm herself. "I see how this could be scary for you, maybe because it resembles so closely the situation your parents where put in but you really don't have to be afraid of me. I'm not going to force you to do anything you don't want to."

"Why are talking like you are victim here?"

She shook her head. "I'm not talking like a victim; I'm never going allow you to make me the victim. If you want to fuss and pout and moan and groan about it then be my guest but you're not going to do it around me. I was fine before I met you and I'll be fine afterwards."

He looked at her shook his head. "I think it might take a life time for me to fully comprehend how I could have been so completely wrong about you…or perhaps I was right. I used to think that you were a weak little thing."

She couldn't understand how he could make it out that she was being the weak in this situation. "I am not weak."

He walked around the bed and eyed her like someone who was going to attack him. "You are," he said in a low tone. "But recently I thought I saw something in you… something more… but now I know I was very wrong."

"Well I can't be whatever it is you want me to be because this is all I am. "She looked at his as he looked at her. "What do you want from me?" she asked him. He was a mystery to her. "Why are you being like this? Are you really that surprised _that_ I am pregnant?"

"Do you think I'm stupid?" he snapped. "I knew what we were doing, I knew there was possibility." He took a seat on the bed with his back turn to her. He was hunched over. "I just never thought that you were someone who had to have everything be perfect all the time. You don't have the strength to accept that sometimes things don't go according to plan. You're still acting like your husband is coming from the dead to claim you."

"No I'm not," she whispered. The more she talked to him the more she was confused about what he was talking about. "I know he's gone, I'm not afraid to admit it."

"Yes, you are," he replied.

"No, I'm not." She argued

"Then why don't want you want to have _my_ baby?"

"Eh…what?"

He spoke low until it was almost inaudible. "You heard what I said; I'm not going to ask you again."

"Well I feel like I have to ask you to repeat it because what I think you said makes no sense to me."

He grunted in frustration and then got up from where he was sitting. He turned around and looked at her. He closed his eyes and pinched his nose bridge between his fingers. "Why don't you want to have my baby?"

She felt her jaw drop. "Is that what you think?" she asked.

"Isn't it true?"

"No," she replied seriously. "Why would you think that?" She was finally beginning to see that he was not angry with her, he was hurt. He was avoiding looking at her because all this time he didn't want her to see how upset he felt about the situation. She had no idea where he got that idea in his head.

"Why didn't you tell me then?"

She shrugged. "Because you don't like kids. It's not easiest thing telling someone who doesn't want to have kids that they will weather they like it or not."

He shook his head. "I asked you and you said that you weren't… why else would you lie to me."

"I'm sorry I lied but not every time someone lies it means that something deep and sinister is at play… I just didn't think you were ready to know the truth."

"So you weren't going to…"

"What, have an abortion? Are you crazy, I know I wanted this baby I was just waiting for you to want as much as me." He stared at her for long while, reading every inch of her body, looking for the truth. "Don't you trust me?" she asked.

He nodded slowly. "Yes, I trust you."

She sighed and rested her head back on the pillow. "I'm really tired now, I think I'll just sleep for little while." She slumped down and pulled the covers up to cover her body.

"Do you want me to take that away?" he asked, pointing at the food he brought for her. She shook her head.

"No, can you just stay here with me?" she asked.

He didn't say anything he just got in the bed next to her but still not touching her. "Can you come closer," she asked. He moved closer to her and put his arms around her waist. She placed her hands over his and guided it under her top until it touched her bare skin. She moved it slowly back and fort over her stomach.

"Where is it?" he whispered.

She guided his hands to the pit of her stomach. "Right there," she said.

He kept his hand still for a while. "I don't feel anything?" he said.

She giggled at this. "I'm only a month along, you're not supposed to," she said.

He didn't seem to mind that she found his questions were funny. Instead he leaned over her and let his lips brush against her cheeks. She could feel that she was glowing red, just like the first time he kissed her moths ago; she closed her eyes and let the sensation sink it. It was still one of the best feelings in the world.

-o-o-

The change in her mood was having a positive effect on her health. Even though she still felt tired she was not in as much pain as she was the day before. Severus, being Severus was back to normal to the point where she couldn't see a trace of the fact that he been angry with her only the night before. He stayed in bed with her whole morning until he was forced to leave to attend some meeting with the person who wanted to buy his house. Before he left he made sure she was comfortable and had everything she needed. He was only going to be about an hour but he still felt guilty leaving her. She had to assure him that it was okay and he didn't have to spend every waking moment watching after her. After he left rather reluctantly, she tried to entertain herself by flashing through some channels on the Tele to see is she could find anything interesting. She didn't know how long this lasted but she fell asleep at some point.

She wasn't aware that she fell asleep until she woke up to find two bright brown eyes looking down at her. She instinctively reached for her wand at her side and tried to sit up as quickly as possible. "Wendy, what are you doing here?"

**A/N: This chapter was so much work. It's a good thing I only have one class on Wednesdays or else I may not have finished it at all. I hated having to write them arguing about two different things. Gosh, thank goodness there will be no more arguing from them from this point on. wipes brow exhaustion**

**Oh and I left a little cliffhanger. Muhahahaha.**


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